My blog of February-May 2017

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All time indications/designations on this page here are Central European Time (CET) or Central European Summer Time (CEST) since I am / have been staying always at home at my mother's place.

Note that June 2017, July 2017, August 2017 and September 2017 are included on this blog page here too, I will have to update the title of this page here so that it goes/reaches beyond May.

Note/remark of Tuesday, 9th of January 2018: The name of this blog page here is totally outdated, this blog page here should be named simply "My blog of 2017" because it encompasses all my blog entries of 2017.

Contents

19th of February 2017

16:53h (approx.) - 17:42h and 20:59h - 21:19h

I know now that I am monitored again (because there are interruptions of my Internet connection) and I am really grateful for that! :-) It is important that there is some kind of discourse or interaction between me and other people and that I realize that there are people who care for me and want to help me by giving me hints. By not using Tor but the regular/unaltered Firefox browser, I make it possible for well-meaning people to help me and to guide me more easily so that I don't get on a wrong path (which is very unlikely anyway)... I don't know which kind of organization it is who additionally helps me to remain a good guy (which would be the case anyway) and to give me the hint that it is high time to write on my website again and explain my present situation, thinking and beliefs, but I think it is probably an organization like Ghost Security, a mixture between Anonymous and an ordinary intelligence agency. But maybe, it is also a regular intelligence agency, but I have no idea which one(s)... Or it could also be Anonymous proper because these guys are really doing a great work worldwide...

What I will do next: I know that I have to try to work regularly in order to become more normal and a better person, and since finding work as a private tutor with children is difficult because I am a quite sick and strange guy and parents don't like if such a guy teaches their children, so I will create a website where I offer computer technician services because in this work field, it is less important what kind of person you are privately. So, I will open this website (also with a dedicated domain) where I offer computer technician services, I just don't know the domain/URL yet, I am still thinking about it.

What I will also have to update is what my voices are saying: They have been always telling me the same: That I will go to the worst possible hell, that I am the worst guy in the whole universe of all universes and more... (I will write more about that later.) The voices for example tell me that one of the biggest obstacles to becoming a righteous people is the fact that I still eat meat and fish and I have a bad conscience because of it, but I haven't managed to stop eating meat and fish so far. :-(

I have also begun learning Arabic, so I will have to explain why. I just want to know how Muslims are thinking and how and with what kind of emotions (humbleness, etc.) they believe in God. This is important because I also believe in God, but probably in a less humble way than many people, including many Muslims, and I have to work on that or be at least aware of that; I don't want to anger or alienate people from me and my ideology because I am too arrogant and not humble enough or create a new movement that disregards what righteous belief in God is or may be.

And, maybe most importantly, I will finally write my biography although I doesn't shed a good light on me because I did a lot of morally wrong things (and I promise to never do such things again).

I will also have to write what I think about (political) violence and that I am really committed to a peaceful/nonviolent life now and that I neither do, justify or advocate any type of violence.

Furthermore, I also have to thank all the people who were around me and who helped me (also the online guys and the intelligence/security services) that I never had to go to prison (I was only in police custody for maybe 2 hours once) and that I can lead an independent life. I also have to thank the Swiss government that it was and still is willing to support me financially by giving me a disability allowance ("Invalidenrente"), supplementary allowances ("Ergänzungsleistungen") and a so called "helplessness allowance" ("Hilflosenentschädigung") because of my medical diagnosis of "paranoid schizophrenia".

What I also have to explain is why I am still sticking to this still relatively unpopular (also among politically progressive people) idea of radical, unconditional, automatic transparency for everybody (and not only for the government and those / the humans in power). The core belief of this type of radical transparency where everything is automatically and immediately published and known by everybody is that we, as humans, are obliged to be transparent and to have no secrets anymore because we as humans are somehow in power over (wild) nature, so we leave ("überlassen") it to the wild animals to still have their privacy because they are the ones who are powerless, at least when compared to us. We, as humans, are all powerful and somehow the "government of the planet", so we as human "government people" have to be transparent even if we belong to the part of the population that is relatively marginalized (politically, socially, economically). (Of course, not all humans have power, for example people who are very sick and incapacitated or have to live in very harsh social conditions like a labor camp have comparably little power, but I am thinking of the vast majority of people who (still) have some degrees of freedom about how they lead their lives and what decisions they take.)

What I will also have to publish one day is my messages (Facebook, WhatsApp, SMS, e-mail messages). Unfortunately, my interlocutors don't want their own messages to be published, so it is impossible that I just upload everything, I will have to upload only my own messages and check them for clues/information who the other person is and remove that information.

I have to leave the computer now in order to write a letter for my mother, I will be back as soon as possible!

Peace! (something that is very difficult to achieve, but maybe, all people can become humble, patient and forgiving enough to achieve it one day/moment in the future, including myself, I have to always be aware of it, I really have to become a man of peace.)

20:37h - 20:58h and 21:21h

My computer unfortunately stopped to work when I was away to help my mother with writing a letter, I was not able to get/have/retrieve/obtain a signal from the computer monitor/screen/display anymore when I returned, so I had to press the power switch for more than 5 seconds in order to force the computer to restart. :-( Now, the signal of the computer monitor/screen is fine/normal again and the computer works normally, but I probably lost my notes that I wrote down in the text editor because I didn't save the file enough times, I just hope that these notes were not too important. I don't remember how many notes were there. I will now read my text again and hope to remember what I wanted to say additionally. But I still remember that I wanted to write down immediately afterwards that I am taking my medication regularly every day (10 milligrams of Cipralex/Escitalopram in the morning and 10 milligrams of Olanzapine in the late evening before I go to sleep). The fact that I am always taking my medication has become such a matter of course that I completely forgot this important point when I wrote the section above. I also want so emphasize that I am aware that mathematics at the university level is very difficult, so, according to this, the didactics of mathematics really has to be as sophisticated as possible from birth. I also want to emphasize that we in the West have to change radically and that our politics in the West cannot go on as it was. The politicians of today are merely administering our problems instead of solving them with radical new ideas and approaches. What also has to stop is our cooperation with dictatorial regimes in developing countries where there is even far less democracy than here in the West. The people there should not experience that we in the West don't care about their plight and the fact that they are not able to politically participate because of short-term economic benefits for some of our companies in the West. If our politics finally change profoundly enough and become truly progressive and democratic, we will also earn/get the respect of most people in other areas of the world and we won't have to worry about our security anymore. And as far as Trump is concerned (who was unfortunately elected in the long period that I didn't write here anymore), I will write more about that in the future (but not too much because it is not worth it).

21:21h - 21:27h

I didn't remember anything additional when I read through the first part of the text on this page here again. So, maybe, there were no additional ideas in my notes and I haven't lost anything. (I took other notes on paper when I was helping my mother after having left the computer, so I at least still have these notes.) But even if I have lost something, I have to continue and get over it as quickly as possible. I have already lost so many ideas until now in the past years and even decades that this issue of this evening is rather minuscule. But I at least have to make sure that I lose as little information as possible in the future and this is very difficult.

21:39h - 21:53h

I have also good news: I managed to lose weight (about 3-4 kilograms) in the past weeks, I now weigh "only" 91 or 92 kilograms (before, I weighed about 95 or 96 kilograms)... I also tidy up my room every weekday / work day now with Teresa, who is my domestic aid / household help ("Haushaltshilfe") and a very kind and helpful woman and with whom I am also learning Portuguese a little bit besides ("nebenbei"). But unfortunately, I am slowing her down too much because of my worry to accidentally throw away something important, so we hardly get on, but at least, the situation is not deteriorating.

Furthermore: I will begin writing my biography today. I really have to start because otherwise, I postpone it even more or even indefinitely. Writing my biography will be a long task because I will remember more and more things with time, so I hope I can write it in an orderly way. Maybe I will have to write a short and a long version of it.

23rd of February 2017 / 24th of February 2017

From 22:50h (approx.) on 23rd of February until 04:33h on 24th of February

Exact time designations/indications (all are CET as stated at the beginning of this page here):

On 23rd of February 2017:

  • 22:50h (approx.) - 23:59h

On 24th of February 2017:

  • 00:10h - 00:12h
  • 00:49h - 01:49h
  • 03:03h - 03:15h
  • 03:43h - 03:52h
  • 04:15h - 04:21h
  • 04:21h - 04:23h
  • 04:23h - 04:29h
  • 04:30h - 04:33h

I have to admit respectively I realized later/afterwards that it was probably a "false alarm/alert" ("Fehlalarm") on 19th of February 2017: There was no intelligence agency/company or Anonymous people interfering with my Internet browsing a couple of days ago (but now it probably is, see further below)... I realized it after I experienced this kind of interruption several times again (and also after 19th of February) after having accessed a particular website/link, so I think there was probably no one interfering with my Internet connection a couple of days ago, but this was maybe/probably an automatically triggered effect/response for everybody who accessed that particular website/link. The link was linked on the "The Intercept" page that I have listed at the end of this blog entry below "See also". The link can be found within the following text: "The ISIS magazine Dabiq cheerfully tells us (here, there would be the link) that “We hate you, first and foremost, because you are disbelievers; you reject the oneness of Allah …"". Don't follow this link because your Internet connection might interrupt too at least for a while; I stumbled across this link and tried to access it when reading this "The Intercept" article.

But now, in contrast to a few days ago, I experienced maybe a real interference (but I am not sure), so there might be indeed people on my connection now. But this is not so important and shouldn't and doesn't affect my work as long as the interruptions are not too long. It also doesn't affect my attitude (and if it does, it would be positively) because I would really like if things would go back as they were in June 2010 when I was monitored and interacted heavily by unknown people over the Internet, because like that, I know that I am doing important work and that my website is not only accessed accidentally, but also accessed and read by real people who also react to the content. (And by the way, since I am much more relaxed now, I will not become more and more nervous and anxious as I did in June 2010 even if such interruptions remain/persist or increase.) So, if I get interruptions that resemble as if someone was blocking and unblocking my Internet access, I will increase my publishing activity and also write more on this (main) website here what I think and feel exactly and why. Very important is to finally write my full biography in a honest and complete way although it shows that I was really really wrong and did wrong things although luckily nothing serious happened.

And as far as my present situation is concerned, don't be concerned: I won't become an Islamist / Islamic fundamentalist. My belief in radical progressivism (socially, environmentally and technologically) is by far too strong. I know that Islamists are terribly wrong, every person on the political left knows that. But what is urgent is that our society in the Wests changes in a way that nobody (including radical Islamists) hates us anymore. The population here in the West finally has to acknowledge and be interested in why some Islamists don't like our culture and way of living. And this dislike is not caused by the reasons many Islamists bring forward or pretend ("was sie als Grund vorgeben"), but there are other, more profound reasons for it. The global left (and especially the left in the West) has to respond to this adversarial attitudes by many Islamists with a socially, environmentally and technologically radical answer and advocate for radical progressive change. Such a change would be possible if only enough people would vote for progressive parties and if finally radical democracy is adopted. With radical democracy, I am thinking of e-democracy over the Internet that would be introduced first in municipal entities like villages and towns, then in provinces/states, then in countries like Switzerland, then in supranational entities like the European Union and ultimately on a global level so that the population is no longer governed by politicians / elected representatives but can truly and fully govern itself. Another probably also very important policy would be the adoption of a radically transparent society, but this would have to be decided democratically, preferably in an e-democracy. Last but not least, it is in my opinion absolutely necessary that the people in the West become truly religious again, but not in a traditional way, but instead in a truly progressive way by believing in the (modernized/up-to-date) values of the Age of Enlightenment which essentially means a strong/absolute belief in mathematics and optionally God (agnostic theism or agnostic atheism) because these two notions/things/concepts are the most fundamental/absolute ones that our culture/civilization and indeed the whole world knows. What we need is a combination of all the good aspects found in the traditional monotheistic religions like Zoroastrianism, Judaism, Christianity and Islam and combine it with a new, radical belief in mathematics and optionally God. This also means that we have to liberate ourselves from all the traditional, unnecessary, outdated or even outright wrong clutter that you can find in the original scriptures of these traditional monotheistic religions. Only some of the core messages/aspects of these traditional religions like belief/faith (in the case of my ideology/religion, it would be belief primarily in mathematics and possibly/optionally God too), love/charity, hope, patience, gratitude, humbleness, honesty, relinquishment/abandonment/renouncement ("Verzicht") of wrongdoing, fear of the consequences of wrongdoing (in terms of one's own conscience or even in a possible afterlife), frugality ("Sparsamkeit"; not wasting or overusing necessary resources), nonviolence, altruism, solidarity, sensitivity, compassion and the pursuit of peaceful solutions (and possibly a belief in the oneness of God whatever that might mean in the context of a radical belief in mathematics) should be preserved and continued in the future. And there is still another major problem since for example Buddhism, another very important and well-known religion, is radically different from my own opinion/ideology/religion/belief system because Buddhism advocates for the release / letting go ("Loslassen") of everything which is quite the opposite from my own religion that advocates radical and zealous this-worldly struggle for a knowledge-related/defined and possibly technological goal. So, the real challenge is actually not (only/primarily) how to integrate the way many Muslims believe in their religion into my own religion, but how to integrate Buddhism into my belief/religion, since Buddhism is a religion that seems to be antithetical to my own belief. I also have to admit that I am really not sure which approach is better: My own one (that can found some analogies/roots in the four monotheistic religions mentioned above) where you have to improve yourself and the world in a this-worldly way in order to achieve an absolute, this-worldly and probably also otherworldly/transcendent goal or the Buddhist one that teaches relinquishment ("Entsagung") from the world. A really desirable goal would be a synthesis of these two beliefs/approaches, but I don't see any possibility for it now, maybe another person/entity will come in the future who will succeed in making such a synthesis real/possible.

What I will also have to do is to finally change the configuration of this wiki here so that archive.org can finally crawl to the text and get it. What I will also have to do is to expand my Facebook page for the transhumanist party of Switzerland and also create a regular/normal/dedicated website for the Swiss transhumanist party (with its own domain, but his will cost me some money). It is important that transhumanists have the possibility to join a truly radical transhumanist party in every country/constituency worldwide. I know that the transhumanist movement shares many demands with the pirate party, but the transhumanist ideology (and its political offshoot/branch) is more radical and outspoken in its demands for a radically progressive social and technological struggle into the (far) future of (wo)mankind/humanity than the pirate party/parties.

Now (at around 23:35h or 23:40h), I have again a partial interruption of my Internet access, so I will have to translate the German words (see above) that I didn't know in the first place later. But I really like these interruptions and I want to thank the people who communicate indirectly with me by blocking and (most of the time) unblocking my Internet connection.

Now (at around 23:49h), I will upload everything (the whole text that I wrote offline) in order to convey my current status on the website and like that, the interruptions will maybe cease/change, but I would understand it really really well if the interruptions continue because I still haven't written my biography which I should have. I haven't checked the the behavior of my Internet connection anymore because I don't want to "provoke" any other slowdown or blocking until having uploaded my text... Thanks a lot for being at my side and helping and motivating me to write and publish! :-) :-) :-) Big hugs and thanks! :-)

01:34h - 01:38h: My Internet connection has at least partially returned to normal. So, beginning at 00:49h, I took the chance / made use of the opportunity to translate the German words that I didn't know in the first place (when I uploaded most of my text) and I also did a few amendments and additions to the text.

See also:

24th of February 2017, 05:12h - 05:29h

Maybe I should include Gnosticism, Neoplatonism and Christian transhumanism (and possibly Islamic and Jewish transhumanist if it exists) into my list of religions (that I know or about which I have heard) too. But I don't know enough about them yet, so I will have to read about them first.

What I will also have to do in the coming weeks is to create a website for PC technician and Smartphone advisory/consultancy services because I want to work and earn a little bit of money in this field since it is so difficult for me to work as a private tutor (as an assistant of my mother) and find pupils because of my strange behavior and appearance. As far as working as an IT consultant is concerned, the only problem is that I still don't know enough about these issues. I will have to read myself through first. Especially in the area of virus removal and cloud computer/storage and backup solutions, I have little knowledge and experience so far, but they are very important if you want to be a PC supporter because these are the main areas where people seek help. So, I hope I will read a lot in the next weeks about these issues and be ready in about one month to start my small IT consultancy service (including an own dedicated website). I will offer my services for very little money (30 Swiss francs an hour), so I hope I will get customers. I have two certifications as an IT/computer expert from 2007 or 2008, so it's quite long ago that my knowledge was enough to pass these certifications, I will really have to brush up my knowledge.

25th of February 2017 / 26th of February 2017

22:45h (approx.) - 22:50h and 23:10h (approx.) - 23:31h (on 25th of February 2017)

Yesterday (Friday), I told my household aid Teresa that I write about Islam and she immediately said "Don't do that" as if that would be something wrong. Maybe she was concerned that I would write about violence committed in the name of Islam which I abhor (and that my text could be misunderstood). For several years now, I have absolutely been against any kind of violence against living creatures committed by whoever and with whatever "justification". (The exception of the principle of nonviolence might be if there is a brutal dictator but we fortunately don't have such dictators here in the West, and even in the face of a dictator, it is probably better to run away from him instead of fighting back ("sich wehren").) So, I will ask Teresa why she said this because I really don't know the reason. As far as Islam and writing about Islam is concerned, it is a reality that the West faces a major challenge from the Islamic world and we have to take the concerns of Muslims seriously, albeit from a politically progressive perspective (and certainly not a conservative one, there are unfortunately by far too many so called "conservatives" also in our own Western region/culture/hemisphere). Only a world where all people are treated equally, have the same democratic rights (and not just as it is the case now in many developed countries, but with e-democracy instead that will become a reality in the near future hopefully here in the West) and are free to travel, work and (im)migrate wherever they want, together with a strong, global belief in progressive values and science (and most importantly mathematics), can help to reconcile the conflicts worldwide and especially the Muslim world with the West. Every person that closes her/his eyes in front of the challenges that Islam poses for us will only facilitate the demise of our modern, relatively progressive way of living in the West (including the scientific achievements that we reached and could still reach). Islam has to be resisted but at the same time embraced as well, and not in the wrong (conservative) way. Only some core beliefs of Islam like humbleness and gratitude in front of God and the belief in the oneness of God have to be taken seriously. But that also might mean (I am not sure myself) that we one day might still develop/achieve a universe that is better than the universe that God created (which doesn't necessarily mean that we suddenly have to stop being humble and grateful towards God because the existing universe could admittedly have been far worse). Furthermore, a really progressive society also accepts that some people don't believe personally in God, but at the same time, the (theoretical) possibility that God exists should in my opinion be acknowledged/accepted by all people (since God can neither be proven nor disproved scientifically). So, agnosticism, be it agnostic theism or agnostic atheism, must be the future of our belief, especially in the West.

Why did I write "conservative" with "" (inverted commas / quotation marks) in the section above? Because the "conservatives" are not even really conservatives because they are responsible for the destruction of our planet by climate change (global warming), deforestation, destruction of marine habitats (like reefs), loss of biodiversity on a global scale, overfishing, the intoxication with chemicals, pollution and exhaust fumes (and a lot of noise produced by combustion engines) also in the West, mistreatment of (wild and especially captive) animals, fueling wars and conflicts among the globe, dividing people from each other, among countless other things. Furthermore, by defending/furthering the oppression and exploitation of less privileged people in the less developed parts of the world as the "conservatives" do/advocate it, these poor disenfranchised and disadvantaged people are being kept down ("klein gehalten"), social injustice is solidified ("zementieren") and people are deprived of opportunities and a healthy and sufficiently relaxed living which is also very burdensome/encumbering ("belastend") and destructive for the affected people. And furthermore, "conservative" people lack any vision of the future that would be necessary to preserve the good things of the past (like biodiversity for example or small-scale agriculture). So, I would not call this stance "conservative", but destructive. So, the really conservative people are the progressive people of the left (including myself, at least I hope that). (And, just to mention it, Trump is one of these bad "conservative" guys, but I don't want to lose more time and energy to write about this very stupid and destructive man because it is really not worth it. Trump is simply a man of the past and a footnote of history where future generations will shudder/shiver/tremble ("erschauern") that such a phenomenon like Trump was still possible in 2016/2017. However, one should not forget that the failure of the corporate-world-loving ("Grosskonzern-hörige") and not-leftist-at-all Hillary Clinton to attract voters (including her decision to not include Bernie Sanders on her ticket) and wrong predictions by polling companies that lulled many politically progressive people/voters into a false sense of security ("in falscher Sicherheit wiegen") are responsible for the victory of a horrific person like Trump.)

What I will also have to change above is the sentence "Don't be afraid". This was a very stupid and crude/half-baked ("unausgegoren"/"unüberlegt") sentence since the question/issue should not be fear of me, but concern about me. So, I will change "fear" into "concern". I want to make clear that I am a harmless guy and believe in democracy, peace, patience, transparency, empathy, compassion and altruism (among other things that are necessary for nonviolence). I am patient. I don't have to be successful now or even in the future because I know that real change is only possible if enough people (and certainly not a (still) lone guy like me) embrace, adopt/implement ("umsetzen") new ideas. The force of democracy and its significance are too strong/important to be discarded or not be believed in. As a progressive, one needs time/patience and a lot of persuasion work/activism in order to see one's own political goals bear fruit ("Früchte tragen"). It is also clear that our democracy is not perfect yet (even here in Switzerland not, see the next section in parentheses), but it can be improved and I am sure it will be improved one day by democratic means.

(As far as Switzerland is concerned, maybe some kind of revolution will probably be necessary sometime in the future here in Switzerland because the "Ständemehr" (majority of the cantons as they are represented in the "Ständerat" / "Council of States") that strongly favors small conservative cantons will probably not be overcome because of a blockage by these small, "conservative" cantons. But even if a extra-constitutional revolution by the people living in cities and suburbs should become necessary because of this constitutional problem/obstacle, I am sure it will be a peaceful revolution because the Swiss political culture favors peaceful negotiations instead of violent conflict. And probably in many other countries of the West, the situation is similarly unsatisfactory ("unbefriedigend") and in many other countries, there are constitutional barriers to a disempowerment / fall from power ("Entmachtung") of rural and conservative areas that are politically favored too much today and will be even more in the future.)

(By the way, also very important is to give young people more voting rights than old people since the potential/need for social, environmental and technological innovation/change is being disproportionally ("überdurchschnittlich") disregarded by old people in their voting behavior. Old people are too old to cognitively acknowledge the necessity for truly progressive policies) and because of that, our planet is ruined in the meantime and the global social situation remains extremely unjust. A person's voting power should be tied to that person's life-expectancy-related age so that the legislation process can keep pace ("Schritt halten") with progress/innovation.

The reason why I didn't write yesterday was that the computer experienced a problem that I had already experience twice (the computer monitor/screen/display didn't respond anymore to my moving of the computer mouse). (By the way, I assume that this is a hardware or software problem of my computer or operating system and not due to interference from the Internet, and it is also a relatively small problem because I can press the computer's power button for more than 5 seconds and it reboots and everything works fine again.) And yesterday and today, I also thought a lot about the really beautiful and meaningful slowdown of my Internet connection because of an interference over the Internet by really helpful and well-intentioned ("wohlmeinend") people: I especially remembered that, on around midnight between 2017-02-23 and 2017-02-24, when I pressed "Show changes" when writing in my wiki here, it took several minutes until suddenly/finally the changes were displayed (and before, for several minutes, the page seemed to be stuck in the middle). This was a really nice way to tell me that I have to be careful with what I write and that my text was probably not optimally/well written (I realized that even more on today's evening when I thought about the slowdown and why it might have happened and why it lasted so long that especially the "Don't be afraid" in my text was not good and I hurried back to the computer to change it.) So, I will continue to be honest and transparent and at the same time also not/never write bad things (which is not a problem for me because I no longer think bad things, I have enough life experience now to distinguish right (nonviolence) from wrong (violence)).

But what I have to do is write, write and write. And no longer be lazy or afraid... I cannot be lazy because only by writing and writing, I keep my promise of being transparent... And most importantly, I will have to fully publish my messages that I exchanged with a guy that I know from my university times and I will also (finally!) finish writing my biography, including the time periods when I was really on a wrong path (2002 until 2005 and partially until 2010 and maybe even 2011)...

I am still talking with this guy and maybe I can convince him that he agrees that I publish his messages too, although in an anonymized form (so that his name and whereabouts are not revealed)!

23:35h - 23:49h

Now, I am experiencing heavy and complete interruptions again. Maybe, it is not good at all what I have written in the past few days and maybe, it is also not good what I wanted to write now. Or is this now the Trump administration cracking down on leftist activists? ;-) No, enough kidding, I assume it is Anonymous or GhostSec (not the company "Ghost Security Group", but the part of GhostSec group that is still associated with Anonymous, see the corresponding article on Wikipedia) because the interruption/blockade was partially lifted. I am also sure that what I am writing offline is read by these people but I have no problem with that because this is exactly my ideal of total and unconditional transparency! :-) Again, thank you guys, you are really doing a great job by helping me so much and giving me so many helpful hints and interaction! :-)

23:52h - 23:57h

I have now even thought about not writing about these slowdowns and my strange interaction with people who I don't know anymore because it might attract people who are not well-meant/intentioned towards me and who really negatively affect my writing or publishing... So, maybe, it would be better to stay silent about these slowdowns and just focus on writing... What I am maybe doing is drawing unnecessary and counterproductive attention to my writing and publishing process... I don't know exactly how the Internet is controlled and managed and its probably better not to get the attention of wrong people. Luckily, I am living in a free country (Switzerland) that lies within the sphere/area of free countries, so it is probably possible to shield me from the influence of countries that are not free and that have no interest that the status quo changes (also in the free countries) and the world becomes more democratic and open.

23:59h

I will change/translate the remaining German words in the section above in the meantime while you are reading my text...

00:00h - 00:01h (now on 26th of February 2017)

I also have to especially thank the guy that challenged me in spring and early summer 2009. I owe much to this guy because thanks to him, my ideology went from "believe in technology" to "belief in mathematics".

00:19h - 00:24h

There was a very long interruption (about 10 minutes) during which I had to wait until my "Show changes" view went active again. I got the message. Obviously, I have to be more careful in what I write... I will rewrite and clarify a potentially problematic sentence (had it been written in the short version). And I have already changed the word "afraid" to "concerned" (like planned) in the section from 2 days ago. And I will translate the remaining German words/expressions (but later, it is now more important to change this problematic sentence).

00:31h - 00:38h

Very very strange is now that although I clicked in the "edit section" of only the last/lowermost area of the text when beginning to edit it, now the whole text (the text of the whole page) is being compared which means that my edit that I did a couple of minutes ago has been (will be) reverted. This is obviously a software glitch or something, maybe it was caused by the software being used to interact with me. I know that the people interacting with me (or should I say "you"?) are technically extremely sophisticated (otherwise, the interaction would be much more difficult and crude), so maybe it is possible to get around this glitch (maybe it is impossible because of the wiki software). Anyway, I will check everything once I have clicked on the "Save page" button and check if the change that I just did reverted, in which case I would have to revert it back.

00:39h - 00:42h

I now think that it has nothing to do with the people who interact with me because I did this small change after I have opened this edit section here, so maybe this wiki software (which is by the way extremely outdated, I think the version is from 2007 or something like that) works like that. So, I know now what to do, I will simply open this edit section again and the problem will probably go away. (Amendment of 01:14h: Yes, it went away, the problem was solved and I also translated the German words in the meantime.)

01:03h

Soon, I will finally upload the text. I have spend a long time translating the remaining German words, I hope I got/picked/chose the right translations.

01:22h - 01:26h

Now, I upload it. Thanks really a lot for your help! :-) (And sorry if I write about it, maybe I shouldn't.)

01:32h - 01:42h

By the way, I am hearing the voices again... For a couple of minutes... This is typical... If I have stress, the voices come (They also appear if I don't have particular stress, they come several times a week). But I know what they are saying, they are always saying the same ("That I will have the worst possible fate."), so, these voices are (still) no major problem. (But they tell me that I will really have major problems, etc., they are commenting everything that I am doing or thinking in an extremely negative way). But I am very relaxed because I know that when I fall asleep, they also always go away. And I am very glad and grateful that I received so much help in the past 2-3 hours. :-) But I will write about everything the voices say, I have promised it to "them".

01:54h - 02:05h and 02:07h

I have promised to the voices that I will write about everything "they" are saying. Yes, I will. (And I will describe "their" content in English because I am even partially hearing "them" in English, really...! In this context, my biography is important because these voices are probably related to my past and what I experienced in it.) I won't write about "them" today, it would be too much for one day.

I have also realized that this page was read a lot in the last hours/minutes, the page count is at 135 hits now, so obviously this page here is read more than other pages were in the past...

02:32h - 02:37h

The voices told me that the time indications/designations look horrible and that this also shows how terribly wrong I am. ("They" are always telling me that I am wrong.) So, I will remove these stupid time indications everywhere. (I also think that they look ugly, so it's not only the voices.) By the way, the sentence that I hear most often from the voices is the following: "You will see it..." or in Swiss German (this is one of the sentences that I hear exclusively in Swiss German): "Gsehsch äs dänn scho no!" (In Standard German: Du siehst es dann schon noch!") And the issue that the voices bring forward most often is that I am still eating meat and that this proves how wrong I (still) am.

01:48h - 02:52h

This time, the voices are really annoying again. They incessantly swing at me ("Sie prügeln ununterbrochen auf mich ein."). But I know this situation, I have become used to it, so it is no real problem for me. I will go as quickly as possible to bed (unfortunately, I still have to eat something, and yes, it is meat, and yes, it is wrong, I know...). Then, I will take my 10 milligrams of Olanzapine and go to bed as quickly as possible. And I will write about what the voices are saying at a later date, when I will also have written the most important parts of my biography.

02:52h - 02:55h

By the way, not everything that the voices say is entirely logical. In my opinion, this also shows that I don't have to take everything that they say absolutely seriously. But "they" are saying that I have to, that I should have to and that I will go to the worst possible hell because I didn't...

28th of February 2017

02:34h - 03:05h and 05:12h - 05:14h

I had the interruption again when I opened my browser and wanted to access this website here and my Gmail account (in order to get the password for my account in this wiki here). Obviously, the people at the other end of the line were already waiting for me as I had expected (and hoped) it: They are really caring for me amazingly ("sie betreuen mich wunderbar")! :-) This time, the blockage lasted for about 10 minutes and I was less nervous than I was two days ago because I already knew the situation and I expected that the blockade/interruption would end soon. But still, despite not being too nervous, I am taking this seriously. I have to be careful what I write and also what I think because my writing should reflect my thinking and nothing else, because otherwise, this would be intransparent and intransparency would be the worst outcome. I can reassure everybody: I am writing what I think, I don't think wrong things and I am really, really grateful for the attention, help and nonverbal advice that I receive. :-)

So, what happened in these two days? I actually wanted to correct and slightly amend the text on this page here on last Sunday morning when I was still hearing the voices and when I was about to finish my writing for that day respectively night (since it was night at my place). But then, my computer had again this problem with the computer monitor/screen: The monitor switched off automatically after 10 minutes and than failed to switch on again when I was moving the computer's mouse or pressing the "Esc" key. So, I decided to wait until maybe the problem would resolve later, but it didn't. So, I waited until now to press the power key of the computer for more than 5 seconds in order to restart the computer. In the meantime, when the monitor/display of my computer didn't switch on anymore and I couldn't work with it anymore, I took a lot of offline notes, but I haven't used them yet now, I am just thinking and writing freely.

Yesterday and today, I of course also thought a lot about the interruption and how grateful I have to be for these interruptions, both because firstly, they are a warning sign to have only good/righteous thoughts (since I have to write what I think because of transparency) and secondly because they simply show me that someone is still reading my website, so I am not writing completely in vain (OK, God would still see it, should it/God exist indeed)...

One of my biggest problem is that I should actually need a "reality check" (again). (I had one in 2011, I will write about that later in my biography.) As far as my present situation is concerned, it would be beneficial if I would be beaten or slightly (only slightly, of course, but in a way that it still hurts a lot!) tortured. So, I am just thinking about how it would be to be the victim of physical violence and then, I automatically know for sure that any kind of violence is wrong! What I will do now is increase the dose of my antipsychotic/neuroleptic medication: I will increase the Olanzapine (brand name "Zyprexa") from 10 milligrams to 15 milligrams and assess the result. If I still have the impression that I need it, I will remain at this higher dose, otherwise, I will lower it again to 10 milligrams. This antipsychotic medication makes me lethargic and slow and this, while certainly not being optimal, is certainly better than being nervous and fast.

What I also have to say is that I haven't left the house of my mother alone for about a year: The only occasions that I left my mother's house was when I went to the medical doctors (psychiatrist, eye doctor, general practitioner and ORL/hearing doctor) and this was only a few times for the whole year and I was also always accompanied by my mother. So, I am at the moment not used to be around people, especially not in the street. The problem is not that I am afraid of the other people, but that I have a particular problem when being in public: The tall, attractive women that I see and the exhaust fumes and cigarette smoke that I have to breathe. I will write later more about that and what it means for me and how I will deal with this "problem" with the tall, attractive women in the future. Admittedly, encountering these tall, beautiful women in the street is actually a small problem and also one that has a beautiful aspect despite the stressful one. ;-)

03:06h - 03:11h

By the way, there was again an interruption (I am not sure for how long because I switched back to the "gedit" editor to write my text), but I just hope to not write anything wrong. The problem is that I have to be honest, otherwise my writing is worthless and not transparent anymore. So, I need to work on my thoughts and ensure that the thoughts are not wrong. And I think that I am doing a fairly good job at that and the fact that I am being monitored helps also a lot because like that, I know that my writing, my thoughts and my ideology/religion/ideas are being read and this automatically massively reduces (actually, it completely terminates ("zum Verschwinden bringen") the wrong thoughts).

03:11h - 03:19h

I have also thought a lot about the question if I should or shouldn't write about the "interaction" with my unknown online helpers/aides. On the one hand, it is more humble to stay silent about it and focus all my energy on not thinking and writing the wrong thing. On the other hand, not writing about this interaction would also be intransparent because the readers of this page here would not know how/what goes through my head constantly and how I am (fortunately!) influenced by these interruptions. And lastly, I have also asked myself if maybe this would also be some kind of corruption of my part if I don't write about it as we know it from established politicians because I am doing political work here and I am influenced by other people (that I don't know) and then not writing about it is exactly what happens in the lives of probably all politicians and respectively people in/with power (which doesn't mean that I have power yet and maybe it is best if it stays like that because power would corrupt probably even me, I would be less honest than now and certainly not write as openly and honestly as I am trying to do it now).

03:21h - 03:28h

I will also have to correct the text that I wrote in the night from Saturday to Sunday because I wrote it too quickly and there are a few mistakes (and too long sentences) and imprecise words in it as far as I remember it.

I will also have to login into my account setting ("CPanel") and see there what the visitors of my page enter into the search field (located on the left) because this is the most meaningful response to my writing that I am receiving so far (because it is text-based information, similar to a message, although in a very short form).

To summarize what/how I have to write: My writing has to be in concordance with 1. leftism/progressivism and the belief in radical democracy and transparency 2. all good/necessary aspects of the traditional monotheistic religions.

03:30h - 03:40h

Now, there was again a blockage and for quite a couple of minutes. Maybe, I am really wrong. I have to say that the "Show changes" dialogue on my wiki is unencrypted and that it is therefore (and I am really glad and grateful for that) possible to read what I provisionally (as a preview) upload to the server. The same is also the case what I translate on www.dict.cc from German to English, it is also unencrypted. So, this lack of encryption is a big chance to being additionally transparent although I am sure that these people (my imaginary friends) would find a workaround even if it was encrypted.

Do I have a loss of the sense of reality? No, not at all! I am aware that we all have to be peaceful, everyone. Otherwise, our democracy doesn't work. What I just have to work on is that I am also physically afraid of violence, that I physically feel how horrible is to inflict damage on somebody. By the way, I am unable to see some video footage of animals being killed. (Trigger warning / Don't read the next sentence if you are sensitive, empathic and faint-hearted because it is a description of something really really wrong and graphic.) For example, I was presented a video on Facebook a couple of weeks ago where a live Octopus was being sliced with a knife. I couldn't see it, too horrible, especially since Octopuses are very sensitive and highly developed animals. I also cannot see videos where animals who have been bred on fur farms are skinned alive. And I have to transfer this sensitivity also to other people and also to myself, to be aware that you cannot and shouldn't ever be violent!

03:40h - 03:44h

So, I hope now that there will not be an interruption again. At the moment, I don't dare to upload it because maybe, I run into trouble although I distanced myself from any violence. I am now also thinking that maybe, the people that are intercepting my preview uploads maybe want to protect me from the wrath of the Trump administration because Trump is really an unpredictable, intransparent, unaccountable and possibly very violent person (we will see it what the Trump administration means for the world and if it is also more violent than the Obama administration already was).

03:45h - 03:37h

If there still is an interruption, I will not know what to do at the moment... Should I just upload it definitely by pressing "Save page"? Or should I decide to wait until a later moment and then try to upload? Maybe the people who are partially blocking my connection also need time and have to discuss how to react to what I have written.

By the way, I have written all my text offline, so I was somehow not aware all the time when and for how long there was an interruption.

03:48h - 03:51h

Maybe I should really go to a martial arts club in order to get beaten up there a little bit so that I really know (also physically and emotionally) what violence means and how horrible it is. But even if I don't go there, you can be sure that nothing will happen, really, really! I am taking my medication, I am under control and also under a high degree of self-control and I am slow and lethargic anyway. And I am honest, absolutely honest, I have no secrets, I have no secret thoughts or feelings, I am just writing what I am thinking!

03:59h - 04:05h and 04:08h - 04:10h

Maybe I will one day be in prison or be homeless or both alternatingly (forth and back between the two ways/modes of living). And there, I will be surrounded by people who also physically threaten me (and maybe even beat me up) and maybe this school of hard knocks will teach me the lessons that I really need to absolutely certainly remain a good guy. For now, I think I am a good guy. I live safely and quietly (apart from my writing here ;-) ) at my mother's place and I receive a lot of support by different people who come to my place (my household aid Teresa and Mr. N., my psychiatric Spitex and also the medical doctors that I regularly visit).

No, I don't think I will have to go to prison, at least not for an extended amount of time. I am not the type for giving the authorities the reason for an extended stay in prison. What is possible are several short stays, yes, but this is still far away because my mother is caring for me and I don't have to go into an asylum/home and do stupid work there. When time will come that this happens, I will see if I am able to sufficiently adapt to the demands of the staff of such an asylum (including doing some kind of stupid work), otherwise, I would become homeless. But this is still far away from now.

04:10h

My mother is at the moment talking with me, I have to leave the computer for a while in order to talk with her.

05:04h - 05:08h

I am back at the computer. What I shouldn't forget to mention is that the voices that I had two days ago stopped after I fell asleep, as they always do. And I haven't had them for the last two days, so I am free of my voices now. :-) And by the way, the voices are also against any type of violence (exception: violence against a dictator or unjust ruler).

As far as "stupid work" that I might have to do is concerned: I will search meaningful work in the area of computer support/consultancy before I have to be in an asylum because as soon as I am there, it will be difficult to get out of there. I have also thought that if I became homeless, I would try to find shelter ("Unterschlupf finden") in a squat(ted) house.

05:09h

I will correct the text that I wrote two days ago as soon as I have finished writing here and uploaded everything.

05:17h - 05:21h

By the way, when I returned to the computer on 05:04h (or shortly afterwards), there was an interruption/blocking of my web browsing activity/attempts again. Now, at 05:17h, the blockage has ended, so I can upload again a new version of my text into the "Preview" / "Show changes" view.

05:23h - 05:24h

I will upload the whole text now. At the moment, the connection is working, so I will upload it all.

05:38h - 05:43h and 05:50h (approx.) - 05:52h

There was again an interruption for about 10 minutes. I was not able to use any of the browsing tabs that were open. So, I was asking myself if I ever get an Internet connection again because this is really unusual and has probably never happened so far that I get such an interruption after having uploaded my text. So, I will have to think what to do in case these interruptions persist even when I am not writing at all (Should I try to use Tor in such a case because I simply have no choice at all although it would unfortunately mean to be intransparent? I also have no idea if this Tor software really works well/reliably.). Or was my text so wrong? I was simply honest and this should be OK. And I am not dangerous at all, at least not now or in the near or middle future. I will always remain honest, I promise it! As a transparent person, I have to be always honest, so nothing can or will happen all of a sudden! I am talking and writing about everything that goes through my head in advance! So, people and society can always peacefully interact with me respectively vice versa.

06:07h - 06:18h

Although it is already 06:07h and I should really go to bed, I will still write a little bit more in my biography (the most important parts from 2002 to 2012). Like that, it will become obvious that I was really a bad guy in my past (until 2005 and partially until 2010 or even 2011). I also promise to never be a really bad guy again although I might live as a homeless guy or live in a squat sometime in the future (and not all people like this way of living) if my mother gets too old for caring for me. I also know that I will have to try to work from home as far as this is possible (in order to reduce the likelihood that I ever have to become homeless), I will open a new website in the next months where I offer computer and smartphone advisory services / consultancy and I will also write an entry of this new occupation/company into the Swiss telephone directory (search.ch / local.ch) so I can be found easily.

07:19h - 07:23h

I extended by biography and finally, finally wrote about my most problematic/horrible years: See My biography and http://lukasgirtanner.info/index.php?title=My_biography&curid=154&diff=4021&oldid=3982 . The information is now published and I hope I won't run into troubles because of my biography. I have no weapons or firearms anymore, I handed my last firearm over to the police in summer 2010 (see my biography). I am glad and relieved that this part of my life, as horrible as it is, is a thing of the past. Now, I can say that I am fully transparent, the only issue that I still have to write about more are my voices, this is also a really unpleasant chapter of my life.

07:25h - 07:28h

I will now switch off the monitor/screen of my computer manually in order to ensure that I can switch the monitor back on when I continue writing.

15:11h - 15:22h

The computer monitor/display works fine now with the new way of operating it, I don't have to restart my computer anymore by pressing its power button for more than 5 seconds.

I want to thank you guys for your repeated blockage/slowdown that I experienced during last night! :-) It was because/thanks of/to this slowdown/blockage that I finally brought myself ("sich überwinden") to finish the most important (and most horrible/problematic) parts of my biography. And by the way, when I was writing my biography, there was no blockage anymore (I forgot to mention it when I was writing it), but I was so much in the mood of writing everything that it was not necessary anymore to motivate me by blocking my Internet connection and you probably realized that too. So, everything is fine now, the truth is out now, the only major things that remain are to describe the current state of my voices and to publish my private messages with this friend with whom I communicate via Facebook, SMS and telephone (the messages are all in German). Publishing and anonymizing (as far as the messages of my friend are concerned) these messages is a huge task because there are several thousand messages.

16:24h - 16:25h

Now, Teresa has just arrived, so I will continue writing (and extending my biography) later.

1st of March 2017

I will move this section here to a new blog page (for the new month March 2017) as soon as I have written here enough new text. But for now, the text of 1st of March still belongs to the 28th of February in terms of content. Maybe, I will also make a blog page with both months on the same page.

00:03h - 00:21h

I think my whole text here arose ("entsprang") / developed because of the fact that I have been learning Arabic for a few weeks. And the real issue here is: Why have I been learning Arabic? And I can assure you that I am simply interested in another culture and religion (by the way, I have also learned Modern Hebrew in the past and I am still occasionally trying to learn it a little bit, I already know the Hebrew alphabet and a few Ivrit sentences relatively well). Most important for me was/is to learn the Arabic alphabet so that I am at least able to guess how I have to read a particular word. And I have realized that knowing Arabic well is very difficult for me who only knows Indo-European languages well and that I will probably never master it unless I would invest a huge amount of time and energy. I see learning another language as a kind of self-improvement (I would also like to know Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Thai and Tamil, for example). At the same time, I have now come to the conclusion that I will never convert to Islam or become a (conventional) Muslim. I have my own ultra-progressive, mathematics-oriented religion and I will only explore Islam in order to see/discover its good/beneficial aspects that are also absolutely relevant for the future of humanity. My goal is to integrate all beneficial and necessary aspects of all conventional/traditional religions into my own new religion/ideology. In case of the traditional monotheistic religions, this is relatively easy (since they are similar to my own thinking), in case of religions/philosophies like Buddhism, it is very difficult if not impossible because they are so different from my own thinking and believing (although I have to admit it that I sometimes (although very rarely) also feel some kind "becoming one" ("Einswerden"/"Einswerdung") with the universe as Buddhism teaches it).

00:28h and 00:32 - 00:37h

To say it in short: I apologize and ask for forgiveness for my horrible past. There is no other word/expression how to say it. We all have to try to forgive the mistakes that other people made and in my case, the amount which has to be forgiven is very large/big. And as far as the future is concerned, I promise to always write and think in the right way / righteously / peacefully. I will also stay in touch with this website here and write regularly and most importantly publish my private messages that I exchanged with a/my friend.

00:30h - 00:32h and 00:38h (approx.) - 00:47h

So, actually, the Trump administration, as detrimental/objectionable/condemnable it is, already had a good effect on me: I have now become more honest. Maybe, the reason might not be the Trump administration, but the people who were on the other end of the line, whoever that might be. I am now naked in the figurative sense and have no secrets anymore (except for what my voices are telling me, but this secret will fall in the next days too because I will write about everything that the voices are saying). It is good that at least I am now transparent and actually, one would hope that the politicians worldwide and especially Trump become also transparent but this wish will not be fulfilled (and at the very least in case of Trump). The world still needs to wait until the people (including/especially the politicians) live transparently, first by manually creating/establishing ("herstellen") / bringing about transparency (because the technical systems are still configured in an intransparent mode) and then automatically.

00:50h - 00:59h

I realized that I exaggerated my goal of "integrating" the good aspects of all conventional religions because there are probably hundred of thousands if not millions of religions and belief systems worldwide when one takes into account the countless traditional religions. I thought of the conventional religions that I have already heard about (these are maybe 10-30) and even among them, I will only be able to consider the most well-known ones (5-10). Unfortunately, it is not possible to know all religions. :-(

2nd of March 2017

02:02h-02:47h; 02:48-02:55h; 02:57h

I just realized that this page here is probably receiving a lot of attention because the page counter rapidly went up (from 172 on around 00:47h on 1st of March 2017 to 480 as of now, 2nd of March 2017, 02:42h), so I will have to explain a little bit more what I meant when/by saying "I am not dangerous at all, at least not now or in the near or middle future" (I wanted to do/explain this anyway but with this high page hit count, I have to speed it up). First of all, I have to say that I am against all violence, now, in the near, middle and also the long-term future, at least as far as the situation in the Western democracies (and especially in Europe and even more in Switzerland) is concerned. The situation here in the Western/European democracies, as great/big as the need of improvement is ("so verbesserungswürdig sie sind"), can and should be accepted by its population and everybody should renounce violence against people and wait patiently until the situation peacefully changes. Because the politicians in these/our democracies, as bad and corrupt as they are (this is a fundamental problem of today's politics because power corrupts and makes intransparent, even I wouldn't probably be immune against it), are accountable at least to their own people to some degree and the governments in the countries of the West haven't engaged in massive wrongdoing anymore in the past few years (after decades of improvement). So, there is no need of committing an act of violence against any government of the Western world (also not in the long-term). And as far as other (to a varying degree undemocratic) countries are concerned, it is better to leave such a country for another, more democratic country than try to engage or punish that undemocratic country's government (because peace and nonviolents are universal values and should be the goal and guiding principle for everybody). So, why didn't I write/include "long-term" in/from the beginning? The idea behind it is that you can still engage in a (most certainly nonviolent!) act of civil disobedience or (of course only small and symbolic) damage of property (of an institution that represents disregard for democracy) and it is this that I think about / goes through my head when thinking about my long(er) term future: Only when I am sufficiently old to not have any other projects anymore (like for example writing this blog here or doing lobbying/advocacy work for my causes/concerns ("Anliegen") like the importance of mathematics, e-democracy, radical transparency, STEM education from a very early age and human/animal/creatures rights/dignity), I would be ready to spend a few hours or days (and certainly not more than a few weeks) in jail for a (peaceful!) act of civil disobedience. You can call that "radicalism of old age" ("Altersradikalität" in German). My big role model ("Vorbild") in this sense/context is Stéphane Hessel who wrote his last and very outspoken book when he was already very old. I hope that I will never run out of ideas for writing or activism and maybe, my last political act will also be a book (of course only an e-book) or, alternatively or additionally, also a peaceful act of civil disobedience like described before so that I did my part for a better and more democratic world.

02:47h

I wanted to write something additionally, but unfortunately, I forgot it, there is still the (rather dim) hope that I will remember it suddenly.

02:55h-02:56h; 02:57h-02:58h

I will now upload my text (the 2 new sections).

02:59h-03:07h

The guiding principle of my life is my belief in God and my own conscience. I am always asking myself "What does God want?" or "Did I do my best?" And this is especially important when I for example forget something because I was not quick enough to write it down immediately (as it happened a few minutes ago, see the text further above). In such a case, I always have to ask God for forgiveness and comfort/console myself that I did everything that I could to act righteously (because sometimes, I am simply too slow to write down everything immediately). (Unfortunately, I am still eating meat and I also use too many handkerchiefs and plastic gloves/bags because of my big fear of touching objects that might have a harmful chemical on their surface, so I am not sure if God will forgive this to me since the duration of my wrongdoing was/lasted definitely too long).

05:15h-05:18h; 05:30h-05:34h; 05:38h-05:42h; 05:54h-05:57h

I was away from the computer eating something and then, I thought about what I had written and realized that I have to apologize for my remarks about the U.S. and remove them (I am aware this is unfortunately not the first time that I have to apologize / further explain something wrong that I wrote). I shouldn't single out just one country and say that this country is significantly worse than the others. Also in Europe, many countries have a bad past (some even much more horrible than the U.S., think of WWII). And the U.S. has improved significantly in the recent decades/years (and one can only hope that Trump won't mean/bring a very big/substantial backlash respectively revert these improvements), although a lot of things are still deplorable (think only of the drone war). Considering everything, I will remove my negative remarks about the U.S.. (they can still be found in the page's history). If I criticize a particular country, I should do this for every country (and even Switzerland has several questionable aspects or black spots).

05:58h-06:00h

I just introduced a new and more compact and clear ("übersichtlich") format for the time indications/designations.

05:28h-05:30h

My girlfriend Christine called me, so I was away from the computer for about 10 minutes and I only upload the text in/from the previous section now.

05:34h-05:37h

By the way, there were no interruptions in the past hours when I was writing. I take this as a positive sign: Everything that had to be said was said/written by me (except for what the voices say, I will describe it / go into it in the coming days).

05:42h-05:43h

I will just upload the 3 respectively 4 new sections now. There are no interruptions right now, fortunately.

06:05h-06:07h

I just unified the time indications on the whole day / in the whole section of 2nd of March 2017.

06:07h-06:08h

I am also really glad and relieved that I managed to expand my biography about 2 hours ago. The new version of my biography in its short form/version is now almost finished.

19:34h-19:45h; 05:21h-05:27h (the latter already on 2017-03-03)

I just read this article, this is also important in the context of what I wrote in the recent days because (hopefully only low-level, symbolic and harmless!) vandalism and civil disobedience are concerned: https://theintercept.com/2017/03/02/homeland-security-sees-anger-at-trump-as-a-driver-of-domestic-terrorist-violence/ . The following sentence can be found within that article: “For example, the report calls private property destruction in DC and Portland after the election ‘domestic terrorism,’ which vastly overstates the charges levied in those incidents,” German said. “For a fusion center to amplify disorderly conduct, vandalism, or civil disobedience into terrorism is inappropriate, factually wrong, and potentially misleading to law enforcement.”

If vandalism is only symbolic (for example spraying a piece of graffiti), it is definitely not terrorism or in any way dangerous. Important is always that one can be sure respectively trust that a person who engages in political activity or civil disobedience knows that any kind of real violence is wrong.

I will create a neatly arranged page where I list all my political demands/suggestions, and its content will also be /serve as the prototype for the page of the Transhumanist Party of Switzerland. I will feature/link that page on the Main Page too. I don't know the title of this new page yet, maybe it will be "My political demands/suggestions". Just "demands" would sound a little bit too aggressive, so the more moderate word "suggestion" should also be there / follow. "Suggestions" make especially sense in the context of e-democracy since in such a system, the population itself decides everything and nobody is dependent anymore to elect politicians/representatives with their demands and "promises" that are most often not fulfilled. Instead, the population, that is entitled to decide everything itself in e-democracy, can only be influenced by "suggestions".

19:47h

My mother just called me, I have to go to her.

20:57h-20:59h

Now, I have to administer my daily eye drops (against high eye pressure) which takes about 30 minutes, afterwards, I will upload everything.

3rd of March 2017

04:00h(approx.)-05:43h; 06:32h-06:39h; 06:56h-07:03h

("from 04:00h" is approximately because I forgot to note the exact time when I began writing.)

At 21:00h (still on 2nd of March 2017), I began to taking my eye drops and subsequently, I snoozed for several hours, until about 02:00h. (At 02:02h, I began using the computer again as I have seen in the browser's history.)

First, I read on Taz.de (until 02:24h, now on 3rd of March 2017) and then I had the idea to go to the website of the Transhumanist Party of Germany, where I read the party's program (http://transhumane-partei.de/parteiprogramm/ ) and visited the page where its leadership is presented. Further below is what went through my mind when I read the party program of the German Transhumanist Party (I wrote my notes between around 02:30h and 02:50h).

Then, at 03:26h, I visited the website of the U.S. Transhumanist Party (http://transhumanist-party.org/ ) and was impressed by the amount of text. Below are a few notes what I wrote in my offline (gedit) editor when reading the website. All in all, I realized that I am more leftist and much more critical of society than what I read on the website of the U.S. Transhumanist Party: For example, I really, really want that humans finally stop to burn fossil fuels and drive and fly around in such an environmentally damaging way. I entered the keywords "plane" and "climate" and "warming" (for "climate change" and "global warming") and only found a section in which climate change is mentioned (but not really damned/cursed), together with "geoengineering" ("geoengineering" is the most horrific concept that I know because it would mean additional damage to the environment). "Global warming" was also mentioned in one place, but just once as one point in a list of other (relatively unlikely) risks. So, the U.S. Transhumanist Party (and the German one too) should really be more concerned about this issue.

From now on, I will upload everything that I write offline, including my (unfortunately often German) comments. It makes no sense to distinguish between online and offline content anymore.

So, here are my offline notes, no more secrets anymore! (small parts of them are in German too):

What I wrote (and subsequently deleted) yesterday about the fact that primarily the local population has to decide about what the politicians of its own constituency are doing might have limits because in an ideal case, shouldn't a global or supranational/continental constituency have the right to influence and intervene too in a local/regional/national constituency if something goes wrong, provided that the global/supranational constituency has noble, politically and socially progressive and most importantly democratic goals? I don't want to mention or criticize any particular country or supranational entity in this context because there is not country in the world where democracy is perfect (e-democracy hasn't been introduced anywhere yet.), so, one can only hope that there will be a global e-democracy in the long term that will also help those countries that haven't introduced e-democracy yet to introduce it. The same in German: Was ich gestern bezüglich "tackling" geschrieben (und wieder gelöscht) habe: es ist eben gerade nicht so, dass nur die bevölkerung eines landes sich um seine regierung kümmern muss. es braucht auch eine internationale bzw. welt-demokratie, welche den einzelnen ländern auf die finger schaut und sie insbesondere beobachtet oder überwacht und im schlimmsten fall sogar eingreift für den fall dass etwas falsches geschieht. und dies muss bei/für alle(n) länder(n) gelten. Ich möchte in diesem Kontext kein spezifisches Land erwähnen, da es in jedem Land noch grossen Verbesserungsbedarf bezüglich Demokratie und vor allem E-Democracy gibt.

nächstenliebe auf Englisch übersetzen: charity, love of neighbor, sisterly/brotherly love.

schauen, welches propanol es war. I will have to look up in the Internet the type of propanol that was in the disinfectant that was sprayed into my face by the psychiatric nurse, so I will be able to provide this information in my biography.

mäuse und meerschweinchen. I had mice and guinea pigs in 2006-2007. I have to mention it in my biography, also in the short version, I forgot it so far.

mai juni juli 2010 dann auch (kommentiert) hochladen, jetzt endlich möglich. Now, since my biography has been written (at least its short form), it is finally also possible to make my blog of April, May and June (and subsequent months) 2010 available, but I will have to add a few explanatory comments there.

mauscursor bewegte sich ab 2010. The cursor of the computer mouse moved in 2010 and 2011. Why is not clear. Maybe the people who monitored me moved it. I will have to include this into my biography (also into the short version).

hatte im juni 2010 angst, in ein anderes land, welches für seine hart durchgreifende und folternde sicherheitskräfte bekannt ist, entführt zu werden. In June 2010, I became very afraid to be abducted into another country that is well-known for its hard and drastic and very efficient measures against people considered dangerous. I will add the mention of this fear to my biography in the next days. (As already stated several times, I am no longer dangerous now, I am committed to peace and nonviolence.)

http://taz.de/Die-Gruenen-in-der-Krise/!5385819/ (German text:) "linksversiffte gutmenschen", ein neuer begriff, den ich nicht kannte... wie SJW (social justice warrior)... The word "Gefährderhaft" appeared in the text that I linked above ("Die Grünen in der Krise"): Elektronische Fussfessel und Überwachung für Gefährder macht Sinn, Haft weiss ich nicht, kommt auf die Person und deren Haltung an. Wenn die Gesellschaft automatisch transparent wäre, wäre sogar eine totale Dauer-Überwachung möglich (viel einfacher als es jetzt ist) und zwar von jeder Bürgerin / jedem Bürger. English translation: It makes sense to electronically monitor people who are a threat to public safety, but it is unclear under which condition a conventional prison stay should be imposed. If there would be automatic unconditional transparency for everybody, intensive monitoring of certain individuals would be easy. But I have to emphasize that such a system would only make sense in an e-democracy where there are no politicians/representatives anymore who could abuse the opportunity to monitor anybody.

http://taz.de/Folter-in-Syrien/!5389010/ horrible! especially when a person is only "guilty" of peaceful political activism! :-(

Here are my notes to what I read on the website of the Transhumanist Party of Germany:

They are not radical enough. They most importantly don't have a program that advocates for a profound and radical change in the learning environments in which children and babies grow up, what they advocate is only an evolution from the existing education practices and a vague description/mention of an integration/use of new technologies (like virtual reality) into education. They often use the terms "teilweise" ("partially"), "schrittweise" ("stepwise", "gradually", "step-by-step") when writing about implementing new policies which probably shows that they only half-heartedly demand change...

  • the demand for automatic radical transparency for everybody is missing (because (in principle,) all humans are essentially the guardian/"government" of the planet and every government needs to be automatically transparent).
  • the demand for a radical overhaul of education / learning environments and not just in school age, but from birth and if possible also before birth, is missing.
  • the demand for a radical European and global e-democracy as soon as possible is missing.
  • the demand for a radical and immediate stop for animal testing of chemical and pharmaceutic substances and all animal testing where animals are not partners of humans with equal rights (and being part of human households where they can roam around freely) is missing. according to the party's program, only "unnecessary" animal testing should be banned/outlawed. but who defines unnecessary?
  • the demand that mathematics should become the main focus of all human struggle (and possibly/hopefully the one and only state religion should this be decided democratically) is missing.
  • the demand that humans immediately stop to fly (only sufficiently lightweight UAVs should still be allowed) and instead use trains and ships for long-distance travel and that a global network of railway lines is established is missing.
  • the demand that all energy production with fossil fuels is stopped immediately is missing.
  • the demand that all people should be able to travel, live, work and (im)migrate wherever they want is missing, instead "rapid and unbureaucratic asylum procedures" are mentioned.
  • also not included/mentioned is the importance of reuse and recycling and an economy based on sharing and an efficient use of resources.
  • also missing are infrastructure policies, especially the need for laying empty pipes into the ground in order to install ("verlegen") telecommunications cables later which is important to have competition and innovation in telecommunications. For the concept, see also "Broadband Conduit Deployment Act".
  • the only good thing is that unconditional basic income is considered / taken into account ("berücksichtigt") sufficiently.
  • true liberalization of freedom of speech is at least also included, also a particularly important point (abolishment of libel laws and the establishment/enabling of "counterspeech" ("Gegenrede") everywhere).

I also read the party program of the U.S. Transhumanist Party and I have to say that I was positively surprised. It is significantly more progressive and outspoken than the Transhumanist Party of Germany. Still, the wording of its party program is not specific enough, for example the proposals for educational reform and the mention of the importance of reason for future society don't specifically say what kind of technologies or sciences are particularly important (though I haven't read all of the party's program yet).

peaceful speech, an important expression ("wichtiger begriff") that I didn't know before (but I was aware of the concept and advocate it too).

I found a very beautiful sentence on the website of the U.S. transhumanist party that summarizes the problem that in many countries of the Western world (including in the U.S. and Switzerland), rural areas have a disproportional amount of voting power, for example when voting for a president (U.S.) or in the Senate (U.S.) or Council of States ("Ständerat") or in a popular vote ("Ständemehr") in Switzerland. The sentence on the website of the U.S. Transhumanist Party is: "Instead, the Electoral College has enabled votes from less cosmopolitan, less tolerant, more culturally ossified and monolithic areas of the country to disproportionately sway the outcome of Presidential elections, to the detriment of individual liberty and progress."

I am really relieved to read the U.S. transhumanist party's website because I see that there are many other people in the world who share the same vision like me. :-)

I also read that they support micronations. As far as I am concerned, I am skeptical about micronations and its also inconsistent with other parts of the party program: For example, the unconditional basic income would have to be paid with taxpayer money. Micronations, on the other hand, further tax evasion and this is would mean that the money for a unconditional basic income would no longer be available. Furthermore, micronations promote the fragmentation of the world and potentially create new borders/limits that separate people from each other. So, it would probably be better to advocate continental states and one single global state / political entity (that are all governed by e-democracy) instead of micronations.

I will continue to read the page of the U.S. Transhumanist Party because I might get / become aware additional points, input, demands or wordings ("Formulierungen") that I forgot or didn't know in the first place.

06:28h-06:30h

It's obvious why these 2 transhumanist parties are so moderate: As soon as the party grows, member who are not really progressive/radical join and these members make the whole party more conservative and less outspoken/radical in its demands. This happens with practically every party, be it the green party, the pirate party or (earlier) the social democrats / socialists.

06:30h-06:32h; 06:40h

I will now upload the text and later (probably only in the evening because I have to go to bed now) make amendments that I already wrote down on sheets of paper.

4th of March 2017

07:21h-07.25h; 07:50h-08:09h; 08:10h-08:13h

I am in a backlog ("Rückstand") with writing both new text and editing/amending existing text because once you have written something, you think about it and realize more and more what is still missing and what has to be edited/changed/improved/clarified. Yesterday and in the past hours, I have written all my additional thoughts on several sheets of paper, in the offline editor and as a voice recording. I hope I will be able to handle/process ("abarbeiten") everything soon. Actually, I wanted to continue writing/editing already yesterday evening (as I also wrote previously), but I fell asleep until about 05:00h and since around 05:00h, I wrote so many additional thoughts mainly on paper that I still have to decide where to continue next in the wiki / online text. I will maybe now try to sleep again. I have taken my 10 milligrams of Olanzapine like usually in the early morning. Normally, I take the Olanzapin before going to bed (at around 04:00h or 05:00h), but since I already slept a few hours this night, it is unclear if I will be able to sleep again now, I am not really tired although I took the Olanzapine at around 06:00h.

5th of March 2017

05:30h-05:48h; 05:52h

Actually, I wanted to upload a lot of new text this morning before going to bed. But it is not possible, because the additions/amendments (and also a medium-sized translation from German to English that I still have to do) would take too much time and I have to go to bed now. I can only upload the text if it is finished and comprises all points that I have remembered until now.

(I have also a particularly delicate point that I already provisionally uploaded into preview about 2 hours ago, I will have to extend this point so that it is clear and concise from the beginning.)

So, bye bye, see you tomorrow (respectively later today)! :-)

Tomorrow, one of my pupils will come in the evening, so I will not have so much time like usually in the evening.

05:57h

The mouse cursor is shaking again, this is really nice, it reminds me of 2010! :-) :-)

Monday, 13th of March 2017

03:10h(approx.)-03:41h

My computer is slowed down now very much because I didn't use it for about a week. One week ago, I also uploaded quite a lot of text into preview, but it is still not definitely uploaded. I am now considering restarting the computer in order to be able to continue quickly my writing (and also finally upload the text that I uploaded into preview one week ago). Also in this situation now, I ask myself: "What does God want?" I have to do what is in the best interest of God: Should I proceed with writing and extending/completing the website as quickly as possible (for which I would have to restart the computer and lose the browser's cache)? Or should i make 100 percent sure that no information was lost about a week ago (since I wrote the website very quickly) and try to retrieve and save all information within the browsers cache? What is more important: Write everything as quickly as possible in an as complete and clear/concise as possible way (especially a list of all political demands/suggestions) and make nessecary translations to other languages (especially French which is still missing totally on the website although I know it quite well; the same for Spanish although I know it not so well)? Or lose time with checking and checking everything again...? Actually, the answer should be clear, but I am still hesitating restarting the computer. Maybe tomorrow, I will jump over my shadow (German expression: "über seinen Schatten springen") and no longer wait and restart the computer to continue quickly. Believe it or not, but I wrote dozens of papers (on both sides) in the last week, full with ideas for the website. And I also recorded dozens (probably 200 or more) short voice recordings with additional ideas.

Thursday, 25th of May 2017

01:45h: It is now already May, but I am writing still on the original page of February 2017 because I haven't written much so far here in the months of May (and April and March).

01:30h-01:44h; 01:46h-02:01h

I just have to apologize for having written that the belief in mathematics should become the (only) state religion. I am aware that other religions also offer some truth or at least interesting and promising aspects for the future of humanity. Especially Buddhism might be equally or even more important than my own ideology/religion, especially since Buddhism in a some way mysterious way teaches/describes an inner struggle for religious improvement/perfection, something that my own ideology (or religion) doesn't. Because simply believing in mathematics (which is also in some way an inner struggle) is not as fundamental and all-encompassing as the struggle for Nirvana as Buddhism teaches it. I also have to admit that I still don't know enough about the other religions. The only religion that I know relatively well is Christianity (since I had to grow up in it), but I also have some knowledge about Judaism, Islam, Zoroastrianism, Buddhism, Hinduism, Gnosticism, Deism, Satanism and Neopaganism and the religions/cults of the Rael Movement and Scientology. I have also read about Shintoism, Confucianism, Taoism, Sikhism, the Baha'i Faith, the Druze Faith, animism, shamanism and Spiritism, but my knowledge is even more limited in case of these religions / belief systems / philosophies. So, I think that all religions have some truth of important aspect that should also flow in / affect my own religion/ideology. Still, my own ideology, as far as it is developed now, will probably not be able to incorporate Buddhism and this also means that my own ideology/religion should not be the sole state religion of any community or country/region. At the moment, with my still fairly limited knowledge of religions, I would say that Buddhism and my own religion would/could (should?) form a pair of two state religions (and possibly Jainism or strict Vegetarianism or even Veganism or Fruitarianism too). I see my own mathematics-oriented ideology as only able to encompass (and at least partially replace or even make (partially) obsolete) the traditional monotheistic religions (Christianity, Judaism, Islam and Zoroastrianism and possibly smaller ones too) and no other religion. I have to be aware of this limitation. The religions of South Asia and possibly East Asia are out of the reach of my ideology/religion (and possibly superior to my own ideology/religion), so I cannot "integrate" or encompass them (let alone make them obsolete) as well.

02:04h-02:12h; 02-13h-02:33h

There is also another current topic: The constitution of the municipality where I am living (8330 Pfäffikon ZH) will be revised until 2020 and the consultations with the population begin in the coming weeks (more information about it can be found here (in German): http://www.pfaeffikon.ch/Verwaltung/Aktuelles/detail.htm?view_EGovNews_OID=374 ). So, I will try to make/introduce the proposal that Pfäffikon ZH becomes the first municipality worldwide where politics takes place as an e-democracy. I know that this is utopian and not many people here in the municipality will support such a innovation (especially not the older/elder generation for which the Internet is not a matter of course unfortunately). But maybe, I can find at least a few people who support the idea of e-democracy (not only within the municipality, but also outside), so that people with this goal can connect with each other and that a worldwide movement for e-democracy can grow (first on the local/municipal level, then on the state-level, then on the national level, then on the continental level and finally on the global level). Pfäffikon ZH would be a very suitable place/municipality/town to begin with a test/implementation of e-democracy because the municipality/town is sufficiently large so that enough people would participate, but it is at the same time still small enough so that no parliament comprised by elected representatives has been introduced yet (which would have to be replaced by e-democracy which would possibly face resistance/opposition by the elected representatives). I will give regular updates of my efforts/endeavors (German: "Bemühungen") in this matter on this website here. OK, chances are very low that Pfäffikon ZH will be the first municipality worldwide to introduce e-democracy because I will almost certainly not succeed at changing the mind of the very usually very conservative people here, I am just one single guy in a municipality of about 11'000 people. But in order to start a worldwide/global movement, it would be great.

02:34h-02:38h; 02:45-02:52h

By the way, my long-term goal is to translate the most important texts on this website here into the following languages: German, French, Spanish, Italian, Portuguese and Russian. These are the languages that I know to some degrees and where I will probably be able to translate the texts on my own (with help from the Internet). Nice to have would also be a translation into Chinese and Arabic and possibly Japanese, Korean, Dutch, Hebrew and Greek because I am interested in these languages too (in case of the latter two languages, I have some limited knowledge from a Pimsleur language course respectively from junior college). In case of the latter 7 languages, the challenge will be to find people who are able and willing to translate the texts for me.

02:37h-02:44h

What I will also have to do is to write the most important policies (my political ideas) in a concise way to the Main Page in English and German. And I shouldn't forget to give an update to what my voices say although what they are saying is really negative and in some ways stupid (but I am able to cope astonishingly well with them). Actually, I wanted to give an update back in March about what they were saying, but I decided to wait until I have more time to give a complete account instead of just a partial one.

Monday, 29th of May 2017

18:51-19:04h; 22:37h-22:43h

On next Wednesday (in 2 days), there will be a meeting of the local Green Party (Green Party of Pfäffikon ZH) which I will have to attend because the revision of the new "Gemeindeordnung" (municipal constitution / Municipal Code) will be discussed (and who the party will send to the consultations/meetings organized by the municipality). Because in the coming summer, there will be several meetings organized by the municipality to discuss the new "Gemeindeordnung" (municipal constitution / Municipal Code). So, I will have to write a little bit of text (also in German) here on this website in order to outline my ideas as far as the revision of this "Gemeindeordnung" is concerned. I will put a link at the top of the Main Page, probably as follows: "Aktuell: Totalrevision der Gemeindeordnung von Pfäffikon ZH / Complete revision of the Municipal Code of Pfäffikon ZH". And I will also write my most pressing/important political ideas on the Main Page. It is high time to organize my Main Page in a better way because now, it is difficult to see/realize/grasp what my ideas are when simply looking at the Main Page. The Main Page is the most important page and by reading just the Main Page, at least all of my most important ideas should become clear/obvious.

22:28h-22:34h

If I could choose, I would have waited until I write more for a couple of weeks or even months. But since this process of consulting the population for the complete revision ("Totalrevision") of the municipal constitution where I live and have voting rights is beginning now, I have to bring forward (German: "vorverlegen") my writing activity on this page here (I write earlier and wait less long than I actually wanted to wait.)

22:35h-22:36h

I will make a screenshot at archive.is for the Main Page as it is now and then begin to quickly redesign it, it will look a little bit different afterwards with a lot of additional text.

23:22h-23:27h

I made 3 snapshots/screenshots (one snapshot from the Main Page, one from the didactics of mathematics page and one from this blog page here) on archive.is a couple of minutes ago. They can be found there (just enter "lukasgirtanner.info" into the search field there). There are 4 snapshots from lukasgirtanner.info all in all there now.

Tuesday, 30th of May 2017

23:30h-23:44h

Yesterday, about 1 minute after having uploaded a considerable amount of new text to the Main Page, there was a power outage in our neighborhood that affected several houses. The power outage lasted until around 8 PM this evening (for about 17 hours), so I couldn't continue writing on the Main Page or this blog page here. Now, power has at least partially been restored in our house, so I am able to continue, but from another computer (not the same as yesterday because the other computer is still without power because one of the residual-current devices (German: "FI-Schutzschalter") was damaged additionally in the house and it will be repaired only in the coming days).

Today, I again added the Main Page to archive.is (the new snapshot is listed separately to the 2 earlier snapshots and I will probably stick to this new system by not just entering "lukasgirtanner.info" in the future, but the whole link to the Main Page as I have done today for the first time). Furthermore, I also added the "My biography" page to archive.is. With time, I will add all other pages of this wiki here and hopefully in one or two years or so, all pages of this wiki here will have been added to archive.is.

Wednesday, 31st of May 2017

04:40h-04:44h

I will go to bed now, I am tired. I wrote quite a lot this night. By the way, I have a new pupil, he has already come two times, he will come the third time tomorrow. And I still have 2 other pupils, so I am working a little bit indeed. And I plan to open an information helpline, so, maybe, I will be able to work more in the coming months.

22:36h-22:45h

I attended the meeting of the Green Party of Pfäffikon ZH and it was nice because we could sit outside immediately next to the swamp of the Lake of Pfäffikon / Pfäffikersee (although there were unfortunately relatively strong petrol fumes for several minutes from a nearby road/street and frequent noise from the traffic and the airplanes). The problem is that I have difficulties at hearing what the people say, so it would be easier for me to discuss everything online and I would also not arrive too late at the physical meeting as I did today too (around 40 minutes too late, as this is often the case). But I am impressed by these people who are, unlike me, able to listen and focus on a conversation even in difficult acoustic situations.

By the way, there was also a guy waiting outside when I arrived at the place, maybe he was there because of me. He slowly walked away after I had arrived. If he was there because of me, I would say hello to him now through this page here: Hello! :-) ;-)

Thursday, 1st of June 2017

01:48h-02:02h

After the meeting with the local Green Party, I wrote for about two and a half hours on this website here and made a break about 1 hour ago (in order to drink tea that my mother prepared, and milk and herbal ice tea). I extended the page "Totalrevision ..." in order to give an account of today's (now already yesterday's) meeting which was very nice, I will probably attend such meetings again. I also extended the Main Page at several places. I also updated the name/title of this page here (by including the months until and including May). Now, since it is already June, the title of this page here is outdated again, so I will have to updated the title again, but I won't do this now. I also saved a few snapshots more at archive.is and discovered that there are two different search result areas for my website lukasgirtanner.info, depending on what I enter exactly into the search field (either "lukasgirtanner.info" or "www.lukasgirtanner.info"). I also discovered that there is even a snapshot from my website from 7th of June 2010 when the website was still active under the domain lukasgirtanner.com.

2nd of June 2017

07:07h-07:10h

For the two messages that I wrote yesterday (also in reaction to Trump's canceling of the Paris climate treaty), see My Facebook, e-mail and SMS messages#2017-06-01, 23:38h CEST (this entry and the entry further below).

20:45h(approx.)-21:15h(approx.); 23:01h-23:18h

51 Prozent der republikanischen Basis wollen/befürworten das Paris-Abkommen. Das sagt es deutlich genug. Das Problem sind die Politiker*innen (vor allem die besonders korrupten rechtsgerichteten Politiker(*innen)) und nicht die Bevölkerung. Es braucht jetzt endlich eine E-democracy, damit die Bevölkerung alles selber bestimmen kann.

Siehe http://www.tagesanzeiger.ch/ausland/amerika/paris-kann-nicht-neu-verhandelt-werden/story/20712405 und http://climatecommunication.yale.edu/publications/paris_agreement_by_state/

Translation to English (for the two links, see above): 51 percent of voters (or members?) of the so called "Republican" Party want the Paris agreement. This shows that the problem are the politicians (elected "reprentatives") who in fact don’t represent their voters at all. And this is true especially in case of (the especially corrupt) right-wing politicians. So I hope that if even a majority of republican voters advocates for remaining/participating in the Paris agreement, Trump will not dare to (re-)promote fossil fuels too excessively. What we finally need now is e-democracy so that the population itself can decide everything.

In the following article, there are two very interesting graphic charts (unfortunately only in German): http://www.tagesanzeiger.ch/wissen/natur/china-wird-in-eine-vorreiterrolle-geschoben/story/11782738 . It is disheartening to see in one of the two charts the still very high proportion/share of fossil fuels and nuclear energy. :-(

3rd of June 2017

01:58h-02:23h

Not very intelligent (and also not self-critical enough) what Hillary Clinton said here: https://theintercept.com/2017/06/02/hillary-clinton-barack-obama-an-attractive-good-looking-man/ It might help politically if a politician is good-looking (and Obama is indeed and Hillary Clinton partially too despite her advanced age), but most people judge a politician by her/his character, attitude and values and not by her/his looks. Politics is a too serious field of human activity for judging people primarily by their looks. Nobody wants to be governed by a politician who is good-looking but doing a kind of politics that doesn't reflect one's own interests. This stupid woman named Clinton botched the election because she was too corrupt, dishonest, intransparent and aloof (German: "abgehoben") and because she didn't include Bernie Sanders into her ticket (which would have balanced her candidacy to the left and brought her more in touch with the population). And because of that, because of the weak candidacy by Clinton, Trump won (actually, he still didn't win the popular vote but because of this totally outdated election system with the so called "Electoral College", he won). And by the way, if ranked-choice voting (see for example here, here and here) had been used in the Presidential Election, even Jill Stein from the Green Party would have had a chance. But even better (the best) would be a true e-democracy with no politicians at all anymore.

4th of June 2017

06:09h-06:19h CEST

I did some writing today on this website here, especially in the "Other topics/issues/ideas" section of the Main Page and also a little bit on the "Totalrevision der Gemeindordnung von Pfäffikon ZH" page. What I still have to say and what went through my mind for the last day was that I discovered last night (around 27 hours ago, at 03:00h on 3rd of June 2017) a still short, but very, very important article on Wikipedia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mathematicism I will write a lot about that in the future because this is exactly what I am preoccupied with and writing about on this website here. But soon, I have to go to bed, so I will postpone my writing about this newly discovered Wikipedia page for later.

6th of June 2017

03:27h-04:20h CEST

After a break of one day (also because of this once again horrific and deplorable event in London), I try to continue my writing on this website here. Now, I feel much more relaxed because I realized yesterday (about 24 hours ago when accessing the website of WeCollect) that the issue of e-democracy is finally being taken charge of, at least here in Switzerland: I discovered that somebody (Daniel Graf, see here and here) is already tackling the issue of e-democracy seriously, at least here in Switzerland because I discovered the keyword "eDemokratie" here), albeit there is no such initiative yet. I can relax now, I know that at least one other person will take care of this crucial issue. If Daniel Graf (and hopefully an increasing number of other supporters) manage(s) to start a popular initiative ("Volksinitiative" in German) for the introduction of a true e-democracy here in Switzerland or at least on the cantonal level (probably first in the Canton of Zurich) and is/are also able to win it, the population will decide in the future instead of the politicians. And my work will only be to struggle for an introduction of e-democracy in all other countries in Europe and also worldwide and, most importantly, to struggle (influence/persuade the population) with the issues that can be found on the Main Page, especially but not only mathematicism (mathematics as an ideology/religion) and ultra-early learning (of especially (but not only) the STEM fields/subjects) for all children.

The title of the page Totalrevision der Gemeindeordnung von Pfäffikon ZH might actually have to be changed because I realized that a popular initiative is the more current/up-to-date topic because Daniel Graf is already active in this regard. So, it might be more efficient/recommendable/expedient to focus on the start of a popular initiative on the federal or cantonal level instead of just trying to introduce e-democracy in one single municipality (which would be Pfäffikon ZH in my case).

Yesterday, I also read the party programs of the Pirate Party of Germany and the Pirate Party of Switzerland and the Transhumanist Party of Germany, but I was not able to find major new ideas for the list of my own demands. Maybe the issue of granting radio frequencies, where I am not an expert and about which I will first have to read. (And other minor issues like the abolishment of the mandatory use of a cemetery, I will add that soon on the Main Page.) But most other topics have already been covered by my own list and in a more specific way than on the pages of these parties. However, I am also aware that describing demands in a more general way (the more general idea/intent behind a specific demand) like especially the German Pirate Party is doing it also has its advantages (but of course also disadvantages and in my opinion, the disadvantages outweigh, with maybe the only exceptions the issue of patent laws which might be a complex issue on the specific level, I will have to write more about that). Furthermore, I have much more demands and also much further reaching and more fundamental demands than these parties, especially as far as the Pirate Party of Germany is concerned which appears quite conservative, prudent and all too moderate. I still have to read the program of the U.S. transhumanist party (which was the first transhumanist party worldwide if I am correct) as I have already done a couple of months ago, but as far as I remember this party also hasn't the fear-reaching demands that I have (yet). And it is not green/ecological (truly committed to deep ecology) enough if I remember it correctly.

And I am also aware that in the future, parties will probably no longer be needed. Because in a system where full e-democracy has established, who needs political parties (and their politicians) anymore? So, the Transhumanist Party (or the "mathematics party" about which I have thought for the more distant future) might be a short-lived endeavor indeed and it is perfectly OK like that. :-)

05:33h-05:44h and 19:50h-19:53h CEST

By the way, I wear now a smartwatch. I began yesterday with wearing it, it is a Samsung Galaxy Gear smartwatch, Samsung's first smartwatch which was introduced in 2013 and which I acquired used/secondhand/pre-owned. Unfortunately, it is only a little bit waterproof. I had to begin wearing the smartwatch to be more efficient at writing/recording my ideas and thoughts when on the go. Because I realized that I lose too many new (or recurrent) thoughts without the smartwatch. I am also still using a quite old Samsung Galaxy S3 smartphone, introduced in 2012 by Samsung, I also bought it secondhand.

(2017-06-06, 19:50h-19:53h: At the moment, I have already 108 voice recordings on the smartwatch which is quite a lot. The voice recordings are automatically transmitted to my smartphone via Bluetooth.)

07:44h-07:55h CEST

A couple of minutes ago, I stumbled across/over/upon this very interesting Australian website (see also here) (when reading https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Direct_democracy and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flux_(political_party) ).

07:56h-07:59h CEST

About two or three days ago, I also realized that I will have to improve/clarify the page My biography, so I will do that in the coming days.

Wednesday, 7th of June 2017

08:24h-08:32h

Yesterday evening, I discovered the following website: https://followmyvote.com/ (introduction of online democracy / e-democracy in the U.S.). So, besides the Australian website/initiative, there is also an initiative in the U.S.. This is very promising and hopefully also has an effect on other countries/regions.

I will also have to summarize / write about all my e-democracy ideas on one single page instead of distributing them over 3 different pages (Main Page, e-democracy page and Totalrevision der Gemeindeordnung von Pfäffikon ZH).

Thursday, 8th of June 2017

02:53h-03:08h CEST

I have the voices again and "they" ("they" with quotation marks because the voices force me to write it like that in order to show that I am still looking down on them which is utterly wrong) are incessantly telling me that I await a very bad fate... That I will certainly see it... That I will go to worst possible hell. Infinite hell... Because I am so wrong... So, "a little bit" of stress now... But the voices tell me that this is nothing yet compared to what lies (or "lays"? I am not entirely sure; but the voices are so pressing that I cannot look it up) ahead. But it is really only a little bit of stress because I know they go away as soon as I fall to sleep. Always... At the same time, the voices tell me that I will be tortured in eternal and worst possible hell without having a body but "as if" I had a body... That I will not be able to adapt at all to this kind of torture that certainly lies ahead for me. So, what to think about it? Believing it? The voices demand one things: True change: Not eating any meat anymore, not wasting so much paper handkerchiefs and plastic gloves anymore and most importantly, change of my attitude: No longer hating (which is basically what "they" reproach/blame/allege/accuse me of doing ("You consist of hate", "You are hate", "You represent hate") and no longer looking down on other people, animals, "us" ("them"), time, God, etc... My own opinion is that these allegations go to far, I almost certainly don't "represent" the principle of hate. But "they" insist on it and I can't change that. But who are they? The only thing that is sure that "they" are electrical discharges in my brain, nothing more. Maybe (and hopefully!) they don't even exist as persons/entities like they are saying/pretending... So, why should I worry so much? OK, what they say about eating meat and using too many handkerchiefs and plastic gloves is true, but everything else might not be true (and hopefully isn't true)...

03:08h-03:09h CEST

What I am hearing now: "It is true. You will certainly see (experience) it."

03:09h-03:15h CEST

Unfortunately, I also hear the following from time to time (also now): "You represent hate, destruction or at least chaos (because you are too stupid to annihilate everything)." The worst that I hear is "Forget your ideology and your "party program". Your true ideology, your true political "program" is the annihilation of everything and everybody, all humans, all nature, all matter, energy, space, even time and ultimately God (and yourself)." What shall I say to this? It is not true at all! Annihilation of everything and everybody would mean ultimate boredom and sadness about what has been lost. No, this is not my goal! But they keep saying that this is my goal... So, what shall I respond? They also say since I am too stupid to annihilate everything, I would create maximum chaos by (partially) destroying everything. OK, this is at least better than annihilating everything, but it is still wrong... So, the only thing that I can do is ignore these allegations and focus on what I can (and should!) change: Not eating so much meat anymore and using less paper handkerchiefs, plastic gloves and plastic bags in my daily life...

03:15h-03:24h CEST

I am glad that this horrible allegation has been out now too... So, now, I don't have any secrets anymore... This has been the worst that the voices are telling me and I have written about it now (finally, I needed a long time!). But I absolutely don't agree with this allegation, it is not true! I want to preserve the universe as it is as much as possible (and I also agree that while the universe might not be perfect, it could be far, far, far worse...) (So maybe, while the universe is already astonishingly benign, if one would try to improve it, if would have to be done in a truly democratic way, involving everybody in the whole universe of all universes, some kind of e-democracy (but preferably with real presence of everybody instead of just a virtual presence) for all entities in the whole universe of universes.)

03:24h-03:31h CEST

I just hope that I don't get any negative reaction from anybody because this idea that the voices allege that I have/pursue/follow is truly horrific. :-( It's horrific and sad at the same time. Sad that a person is in the situation having to hear that. But I have become used to that. And I firmly know (at least I hope so) that my real, ultimate desire is the preservation of the universe as it is and if there is an improvement, it must be democratic! And if God would be replaced, it would have to be done democratically and if possible consensus-based (including the consent of God herself/himself/itself).

03:31h-03:33h CEST

(My mother is in the kitchen, I have to go looking what she is doing.)

05:02h-05:05 CEST

The voices keep telling me that "deep down in me is such a hatred" that I would "press a button with which the whole universe (probably including God) would be annihilated". And I keep repeating that I wouldn't. Only if someone is tortured/tormented/suffering massively and acutely and hasn't adapted to the torture/suffering yet, he/she might press such a button out of sheer despair in order to stop the suffering. But I am not suffering like that. And even if I was, this would only be for a few moments.

05:05h-05:17h CEST

By the way, I am like everyday taking my medication and I know for sure that the voices will go away as soon as I have fallen asleep. This is always the case fortunately. But even if the voices stayed, I would be able to cope with them. It is not a real problem. I know what they are always saying and it is not a new situation for me. And I have taken my medication (10 milligrams of Olanzapin Sandoz / Olanzapine) regularly every day in the past months and even years at around 3-5 AM in the morning and I also did so tonight. And tonight, I additionally took 5 milligrams of Haldol / Haloperidol too (I don't take Haldol every day, but maybe 1-2 times a week.). (And in the afternoon also 10 milligrams of Cipralex / Escitalopram as I always do.)

06:39h-06:41h CEST

I am tired and I will go to bed now (and also take the eye drops (against high eye pressure) as always when going to sleep).

16:05h-16:11h CEST

I will have to improve the page about the UMISes (Universal Mathematical Information System(s). And I just hope that Corbyn will win the election in the UK (as long as e-democracy is not yet in place which would be far better in any case).

Friday, 9th of June 2017

03:19h-03:32h; 03:50h; 03:54h CEST

By the way, I have the voices again. It is rare that I have "them" in two subsequent days. But I am OK with "them", because I have got used to "them". I will probably take again 5 milligrams of my reserve/backup medication (Haldol / Haloperidol). I am really astonished how calm I am when these voices are here. I know them, I know what they are saying and it is always essentially the same that they are saying, so it is no problem. Although if it was even remotely true what "they" are saying, I would be truly in trouble. But I don't believe respectively I only partially believe what "they" are saying (and this is exactly the problem, according to them; because I would very quickly change if I truly believed them).

Tonight, I partially read the 126-pages manifesto of the British Labour party. Impressive, finally a party with a really long and elaborate party program! :-) But I was disappointed a little bit because no fundamentally new demands are there. But still, as far as economic policy is concerned (where I am not a specialist, for example when it comes to the management of public goods/utilities/services), I might be able to learn something (I hope I find time to read it in more detail.). But the biggest disappointment was that I didn't find any reference to an Internet-based democracy (Main Page#E-democracy), one of my favorite topics. But who would expect politicians to abolish their profession? No more feelings of importance and grandiosity... (As far as I am concerned, I also want to have an influence in the world, but because I believe in my ideas, not because I want to be somebody, in the face of God or the universe of all universes, we are tiny.)

Saturday, 10th of June 2017

07:39h-07:43 CEST

Today, I slightly extended (and hopefully improved) the Main Page. And I created a new page Are the social sciences and humanities too conservative?. And like always now, I made a snapshot of the pages that I changed on archive.is. Soon, I will go to bed.

Sunday, 11th of June 2017

01:23h-01:38h; 01:39h CEST

This is interesting: The Tories got only 2 percent more votes, but they still got many seats more (much more than 2 percent more) (which is the same phenomenon as in case of the Trump victory where Hillary Clinton got more votes than him but still was not elected): See in this article here that I just read (and probably also in the Wikipedia article about the election). The election system in the UK is really stupid, it doesn't make sense (apart from the fact that e-democracy should be introduced globally or at least in all free and democratic countries anyway). If the Labour Party would have gotten seats according to the percentage of people who voted for them, they could form a coalition with the SNP (and possibly the Liberal Democrats) and form the government. But because of this stupid election system where only the winner of a voting district/constituency is counted, this is not possible. But as I said before, an e-democracy with one single constituency nationwide would be the best because like that, the people would really have the power.

Monday, 12th of June 2017

02:58h-03:23h; 03:24h-03:25h CEST

What I read tonight (Unfortunately, I read the articles only partially, maybe I still find time to read them in full.):

I am sure if Hillary Clinton had chosen Bernie Sanders as her running mate, she would be present now and not this even more horrible (than Clinton) person called "Trump". Because most young voters want authentic and sincerely leftist politicians, guys like Sanders or Corbyn (or possibly me if I had the resources to run for office, especially since I have a lot of new ideas that I was not able to find anywhere on the Internet so far).

Furthermore, I have the voices again (I had them for quite a lot of nights in the past days, almost every night) who basically always say the same: That I am the worst entity in the whole universes of all universes (and therefore also much ("infinitely, in fact!") worse than Trump or the worst dictators of the past) and that as a result, I deserve the worst possible fate: Truly eternal and worst possible hell. And that I will inevitably/certainly see/experience it and that I will see/experience to what kind of extent "they" ("we", your voices) are/were right. (in Swiss German: "Gsehsch äs dänn scho no!" / "Gsesch äs dänn scho no wiä sehr miär rächt ghaa händ!"). And that I will perish in the total chaos that I would have created if given the chance. But all in all, I have become used to the voices and what they say, so no problem... ;-)

03:26h-03:29h CEST

When I respond to "them" that I will issue a complaint at the "Supreme Court of the universe of all universes" (God), they say that I am ridiculous, that God will certainly not help me and that I will see/experience it (everything that will befall me) certainly.

Wednesday, 14th of June 2017

06:27h-06:37h CEST

Today (this night) and also the day before, I found two notable websites:

I will also have to edit/extend/create the German-language Wikipedia articles of e-democracy and mathematicism (and possibly more articles, I made notes somewhere but I don't know where exactly, I will have to search for it). Nice would also be an English- and German-language Wikipedia entry for "Alienation from nature".

Thursday, 15th of June 2017

05:51h-06:04h CEST

I discovered the pages http://www.genomi.ch/ and https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sortition (I already added these two links in the corresponding section on the Main Page). And I (re-)discovered the party program of the Transhumanist Party of the U.S., it seems to be updated now (I read about the first third of it). The party is obviously (still) libertarian and against radical/unconditional/automatic and universally enforced transparency. And (some) harmful technology is also not criticized enough. Interesting is also that the party voted on its party program and at the same time doesn't charge membership fees (yet) which is actually very good (because party membership should be free) but unfortunately it also increases the risk that the party is infiltrated by people who are not transhumanists/progressives, but too conservative (which would negatively affect its policies if they are voted on democratically which seems to be the case).

06:11h-06:14h CEST

I will have to read the program of the U.S. Transhumanist Party in full, maybe I still find some inspiration/input there.

Saturday, 17th of June 2017

01:54h-02:03h CEST

Actually, I wanted to upload more amendments of the Main Page. But the voices came and this time, they are astonishingly aggressive. They demand that I truly change which would mean to delete this website here, forget everything about my ideology, no longer eat meat and most importantly face my worst fears by working as a rubbish collector or in tunnel construction or a mine (for extracting natural resources). Horrible! But they demand it... And they keep saying that I will be punished in the most horrible way. Very strange is that today, a few hours ago (when exactly I don't remember) I took Haldol but it seems to me as if it has the opposite effect: Instead of calming me (my brain) down, increasing its negative activity. I will now go and take my regular . And I will upload what I wrote later... And yes, they keep telling me that I stand for nothing but hate, arrogance, chaos and ultimate destruction. That my real wish is to annihilate the whole universe (of all universes) including God... What shall I say to "them" other than this is not true?! Horrible what they are saying, but they insist on telling me that the most horrible entity in the whole universe of all universes is me (except maybe for the devil himself/itself/herself)... I just hope that the voices go away. If they continue to torment me like that, I will have to consider beginning to take Leponex (Clozapine), but actually, I really don't want that. And the voices also tell me that it won't help because the problem is not the wrong medication but that I am the problem. Me... And that there will be no medication at all when I will be (truly!) punished in eternal and worst possible hell because I will not have a body anymore but I will be punished eternally as if I had a body, but without any ability or opportunity to adapt to the ways I will be tortured and that this is certain, very certain if I continue like that and don't change... :-( :-( :-( :-( "Gsehsch äs dänn scho no!" (You will most certainly see/experience it!).

02:07h-02:11h CEST

I just hope that the voices don't continue like that. I even made a mistake at writing before (that I corrected now) because "they" are stressful, let's say it like that, they are very very very slightly stressful... And they keep saying that this is nothing yet, that I will experience true stress if I continue like that... So I have to admit that the stress that I am experiencing now is nothing compared to what (inevitably as the voices are saying) lies ahead...

02:12h-02:16h CEST

"Why is life so difficult?" (am I asking now.) And what "they" respond is: "You will see it that it was not difficult at all so far... You will experience real difficulties... It will be horrible! Infinitely worse than now. Mathematically/Truly infinitely worse than now! Because you got it so wrong!!!! Wrong, wrong, wrong, as wrong can be! And you wanted to be wrong! You deliberately chose the wrong path but you are/were stupid enough to not realize the consequences!"

Wednesday, 21st of June 2017

03:10h-03:17h; 04:24h-04:43h CEST

Now, it is already the longest day of the year and from now on, the days will become shorter again (on the Northern hemisphere). The voices that I had a couple of days ago and that I described in the preceding blog entry (from last Saturday early morning) were really strong. I haven't/hadn't had such strong voices for several years. But luckily, in the meantime (since last Saturday early morning when they were so strong), I have only heard the voices 2 or 3 times and only in a weak way, so I hope that the voices won't increase their intensity again. Furthermore, I have now begun to take 2.5 milligrams of Haldol (Haloperidol) every second day in addition to 10 milligrams of Olanzapin Sandoz (Olanzapine) (and of course the 10 milligrams of Cipralex/Escitalopram), so I will (thanks to the Haldol) hopefully not have the voices in an intensity/strength like I had to endure them in the night from Friday to Saturday. So, the issue of taking the relatively risky Leponex (Clozapine) is fortunately off the table for the moment. At the moment, it is hot outside during the day here in Switzerland, so I am slower and I am less productive at writing and thinking. (During the night, the room is fortunately much colder when I have the balcony door open.) But I hope I will be able to continue on the Main Page as soon as possible (I already did some changes, but I had to interrupt my writing because of the voices in the night from Friday to Saturday.).

Monday, 26th of June 2017

23:28h-23:31h CEST

Today (this evening), I was at the meeting of the municipality for collecting ideas for the new Municipal Code. I just added the following section where I described the evening: Totalrevision der Gemeindeordnung von Pfäffikon ZH#Update 2 of.2Fvom 26.06.2017

Wednesday, 28th of June 2017

05:23h-05:36h CEST

About 2-3 hours ago, I accidentally saw a frog in our garden (when I released another animal (a relatively small insect) to our garden that had got lost in our house), which is quite rare. The frog was light brown / beige colored. I really love and appreciate frogs and in fact all amphibians, although they are unfortunately not very suitable for interactions with robots.

Friday, 30th of June 2017

02:24h-03:02h; 05:45h-05:49h CEST

(with a further amendment already on 1st of July 2017 at 04:24h-04:25h CEST)

Today, I had to go to my new storage room to get the key (I have to leave my old storage room until the end of July because the building there will be renovated.). So, I had to travel to this storage room and also back which was arduous (German: "mühsam"). Especially the tall, attractive, elegant women that you inevitably see/encounter when you are among a lot of people (and during rush hour, when I had to return home today, there are a lot of people in the public transport indeed) are difficult to bear / come to terms with. I saw a very attractive woman but I was unfortunately not able to talk with her (she was talking with another woman all the time). After having returned home, I also m_st_rb_t_d (with omitted letters because of the need for family-friendliness of this page here) with this amazingly looking tall blond, elegant and already slightly aged lady by fantasizing how it would be to k_ss and m_k_ o_t with her...

And as you may have noticed, I also wrote on my biography quite a lot yesterday (a little bit less than a day ago). Actually, I only wanted to write a little bit on the my biography page, but I couldn't stop and wrote more and more.

I also had an interruption of Internet on the computer with which I am writing on this wiki here, but strangely, the Internet on my 2 other devices was still working. So, what was the reason for this temporary complete Internet service interruption on this computer here? Was it because I wrote/extended wrong things on the my biography page? Or simply a temporary software issue on the computer? Maybe I will have to amend certain statements/sentences in my my biography page. Actually, I planned to restart the computer should the interruption not resolve itself, but it obviously was resolved and I can now continue to write without having to restart the computer.

I also partially read (skimmed through) the current Municipal Code of my home town Pfäffikon ZH for the first time and discovered an interesting passage (after having received a corresponding hint at the meeting of last Monday evening). On page 7 ("Art. 8"), it is written: "In der Gemeindeversammlung kann ein Drittel der anwesenden Stimmberechtigten verlangen, dass über einen Beschluss nachträglich an der Urne abgestimmt wird." (Translation to English: "At the municipal/communal assembly / town meeting, a third of the eligible voters who are present on site have the right to demand that a popular vote about a certain issue is called/organized.") So, maybe also like that, e-democracy could be introduced at the municipal level. The only thing that you have to do is to find sufficient people who are able and willing to go to a town hall meeting and demand a popular vote on the issue of e-democracy at the municipal level. And hopefully, the ballot will then pass at the popular vote.

Saturday, 1st of July 2017

04:20h-04:43h CEST

I had to slightly correct (write underscores) the text above (from yesterday) in order to increase its family-friendliness.

By the way, I have the voices again. They are incessantly telling me how wrong I am and that (just to give an example) should stop writing on this website here, delete it, forget it and instead learning to work (with an emphasis on the word "work"). Work as hard as possible in a profession that I fear most, for example rubbish/garbage collection (waste disposal) or work in a mine/pit or in tunnel construction.

I just wanted to say that I also like women very much who don’t fit like a classically elegant lady. My preferred woman can be and look clearly leftist and this is perfectly OK for me, actually, I prefer far-leftist women, they are the best, although I unfortunately never had such a girlfriend. I have only had one girlfriend so far, Christine, she is in a way leftist too of course, otherwise our relationship would not be possible. On the other hand, it is also a challenge to appeal to a tall fashion-model-like woman who looks elegant in a classic way because if you can get access to such a woman, you know that you are attractive. When it comes to attractive-looking women, I am like a child, totally inexperienced, superficial and possibly naive.

Similar text in German (I first wrote it in German in my offline notes): Ich mag auch linksalternativ aussehende Frauen mit Modelfigur sehr, charakterlich natürlich ohnehin viel mehr als Mainstream-Modelfrauen. Bei im konventionellen Sinn eleganten Modelfrauen ist der Egokick einfach noch grösser, weil mensch hier mit einer erfolgreichen Geldfrau ins B_t_ gehen kann... Ich weiss, dass ich damit gegen meine eigenen linken Werte verstosse, aber bei Frauen (und wohl auch sonst) bin ich einfach noch wie ein kleines Kind, total unerfahren, naiv und oberflächlich.

21:36h-22:37h CEST

(written/extended a little bit also on 20:14h and 20:30h on 3rd of July 2017)

I am thinking/contemplating/considering if I should go with the special/extra/chartered train (the page is in German) to next week's meeting/summit of the "G20" in Hamburg to join the protest against the people who are in power globally. The aforementioned train would start in Basel and go to Hamburg, so, from Basel, I would be together with other anti-G20 activists. (First, I would have to travel from Pfäffikon ZH to Basel alone by train.) Actually, I should go to Hamburg in order to meet new people with whom I share my political views and maybe lasting friendships could begin like that (which I really need since unfortunately, I don't know anybody yet who is truly engaged in far-leftist / anticapitalist struggles). But on the other hand, I am afraid to go to Hamburg because I am so sensitive against anything, including noise and aerosols which I will certainly encounter when participating at a demonstration against the G-20 in Hamburg. Think only of the fireworks that the activists will probably use. I can't stand fireworks, they are far too loud! And the tear gas and possibly rubber bullets used by the police are also not nice, I have no experience with them, the exposure to them is probably horrible. So, the best thing would probably be if I travel with the aforementioned special train in order to meet new people but that, once in Hamburg, I would not participate at the demonstrations or at least only the ones where it is expected that no police will interfere. But even in such a completely peaceful demonstration, fireworks might be set off by the activists themselves and this is not good for my ears (even if I wear earplugs). Another problem is that it might be too late now to purchase and receive (by postal mail) the ticket for this train and I don't know if it is possible to purchase the train ticket also at the beginning of the journey of the train. But generally, it is a very good and important idea to bring people to Hamburg by train because it is the environmentally most friendly way for medium- and long-distance travel and furthermore it gives the travelers the opportunity to socialize and make new friendships while en route. Most importantly, it is crucial that as many people as possible participate in the protests against the G20 summit in order to show the politicians (and especially those of the G20) that we need more democracy and that reforms for a new type of democracy (in an ideal case e-democracy) are urgent.

Christine (my girlfriend) called me twice and we twice had a conversation while I was writing this section here. Because of that, I was also that slow at writing (see the indications of time in the title of this subsection here, I needed about one hour for this medium-sized (sub)section here.). I told her that I am thinking about going to Hamburg with this special train and she told me that it is almost certain that I won't go there since I only very rarely leave the house/home where I am living with my mother. And this is true: I really don't like to leave the house of my mother and especially not to go to places where it is loud or where unhealthy air is present (apart from the fact that I also/additionally have to cope with the fact that I cannot date every attractive woman who I inevitably see when being around a lot of people). Furthermore, I told Christine that she should also open a website (like me) and write on it and that I would help her to do it since she doesn't know how. But at the moment, she doesn't even have a computer, poor Christine! :-(

Monday, 3rd of July 2017

20:14h-20:44h; 20:45h-20:56h; 21:11h; 21:13h CEST

(most of the following section was written before offline)

This morning, I wrote the e-mail to the municipal clerk and I am now waiting for an answer (I haven't received an answer yet). What I will also do from now on (finally!) is to publish my private notes. Unfortunately, most of them is in German. But it is important to see what my own ideas to today's news are. So, here is the first tranche of my private notes:

Den begriff "unkraut" verbieten! Das "unkraut" sind wenn schon die menschen...

"Parasiten" auch

Krankenkassenkarte swica mutter geben, damit sie in der apotheke das ganfort beziehen kann!

Es gäbe keine solchen tragischen busunfälle mehr, wenn endlich assistenzsysteme (car-to-network, car-to-car infrastruktur und autonome kollisionsvermeidungssysteme) eingebaut wären!

http://www.tagesanzeiger.ch//15603160

http://www.tagesanzeiger.ch/zuerich/stadt/extremer-wohnen/story/19405248

  • Das sei wie früher im Dorf, als jeder noch jeden persönlich gekannt habe und sich die Menschen nicht in ihren eigenen vier Wänden verschanzt hätten: «Der Rückzug in die Kleinfamilie war ein Ausdruck des aufkommenden Wohlstands», sagt Emma. Jedem sein Häuschen und rundherum eine Hecke. Diese Zeiten seien vorbei.
  • Auch für kletternde tiere und roboter wäre das hallenwohnen natürlich ein paradies.
  • SEHR WICHTIGER ARTIKEL!!! NICHT VERGESSEN!
  • So wenig privatraum wie möglich haben! das ist modern und so sollte es sein! möglichst alles kollektiv, alles transparent, möglichst alles geteilt und so maximal genutzt! die menschen sollen alles übereinander wissen und es soll keine privatsphäre mehr geben!
  • Super bild mit folgender bildunterschrift: Oder ein raumsparendes Kapselhotel in Tokyo. Foto: Barry Lewis (Alamy Stock). Im prinzip braucht es wirklich nur einen eigenen schlafplatz mit ein paar steckdosen, und auch der sollte wenn möglich kollektiv genutzt werden
  • Weiteres bild mit folgender bildunterschrift: So sah Raumsparen auf dem Labitzke-Areal in Altstetten aus. Foto: Doris Fanconi

Affen auch noch ins UECHE integrieren? Neben delphinen, oktopussen, fledermäusen, mäusen, schwinen, ratten und hunden? gerade affen würden vom hallenwohnen enorm profitieren (im winter, wenn sie drinnen sein müssen). die frage ist welche affenarten... menschenäffinnen und affen oder makakinnen und makaken? zudem stellt sich frage von impfungen/krankheiten.

Funktionale und helle kleidung für alle und auch für polizist*innen!

Ich muss in meiner issues-liste explizit darauf hinweisen, dass gewalt der falsche weg ist. Nicht dass es diesbezüglich noch ein missverständnis gibt! Wer hier im westen wohnt, sollte niemals gewalt anwenden bzw. auf gewalt komplett verzichten. (anmerkung von 20:25h: habe ich soeben erledigt, siehe den "issues"-abschnitt auf der Main Page)

http://www.tagesanzeiger.ch/ausland/europa/koenig-emmanuel-i/story/14599884 hat irgendjemand, der halbwegs bei sinnen ist, etwas anderes erwartet?

http://www.tagesanzeiger.ch/zuerich/verbrechen-und-unfaelle/wurde-carlos-unmenschlich-behandelt/story/13068597 zwei wochen im gefängnis ohne matratze schlafen, das ist schon recht hart. Buchstäblich hart. Trotz renitenten benehmens.

http://www.tagesanzeiger.ch/zuerich/verbrechen-und-unfaelle/carlos-ist-psychisch-schwer-krank/story/21640077 carlos griff opfer ohne vorwarnung an. erinnert mich an mich selber: Ich hatte nicht damit gerechnet, dass der pfleger in der psychiatrischen klinik, in der ich 2004 war, mich ansprüht. Plötzlich sprühte er und das viermal, siehe auch My biography (bis jetzt nur auf Englisch).

In meiner biographie schreiben, dass ich am ende meiner jugendzeit sozial inkompetent war und wenig ausserschulische erfahrung mit gleichaltrigen hatte. das ist wichtig, um meine darauf folgenden fehler zu verstehen.

http://www.tagesanzeiger.ch/schweiz/standard/man-muss-die-fahrer-dieser-laermenden-autos-in-flagranti-erwischen/story/19359030 wo ist die forderung nach car-to-network communication und der totalen überwachung und steuerung durch künstliche intelligenz von allen motorfahrzeugen? Bastien girod ist sich offensichtlich gar nicht bewusst, dass/wie mensch das übel der lärmenden und mit abgasen vergiftenden motorfahrzeugen an der wurzel packen könnte! Mit technologie und staatlich geförderten/erzwungenen car-to-network-communication-standards (siehe auch https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vehicular_communication_systems und https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intelligent_transportation_system , beide Links sind auf Englisch; Links auf Deutsch: https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Car2Car_Communication und https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Verkehrstelematik ). niemand mehr soll ein motorfahrzeug selber lenken dürfen! und es soll keine übermotorisierten fahrzeuge mehr geben.

Keine Mäuse und Ratten auf Inseln einführen (auch nicht als Haustiere, Risiko des Entweichens ist zu gross), wo die Tiere nicht schon heimisch sind.

I am aware that some thoughts are not so important, but I will upload everything, so that not-so-important issues are between more important issues/ideas.

21:16h-21:19h CEST

Ich nehme immer wieder Anläufe, meine persönlichen Notizen / Verlaufsnotizen hochzuladen / zu publizieren, ich hoffe, dass es jetzt damit definitiv klappt... Und ich nicht wieder damit aufhöre... :-(

Tuesday, 11th of July 2017

02:50h-03:17h CEST

It is difficult. I have the voices again. They are relentlessly telling me what kind of a bad (and even evil) person I am. That I "will see it". That I should decide between closing this website or write everything that goes through my mind. No longer selective information. That I should look for work in one of the professions that I abhor most. That I should embrace life and be grateful for it, not always be not grateful. Because it could be infinitely (mathematically infinitely) worse. And that I will suffer in the worst possible hell for infinity because I didn't choose the path of/to God, but the devil (devil as a truly independent (from God) force of evil, not just as a fallen angel or something like that). So, what shall I respond to these voices? Is dissent still allowed? They also give examples: For example, because Hitler only wanted his empire to last 1000 years, but I have the vision of a truly infinite empire (of course democratic, but the voices say that I am not a democrat at all), this shows how wrong I am, and that I am infinitely worse than even Hitler. Or in other words: Infinite wrong ambition, infinite punishment!

I also had a strange interruption on just the computer that was using (browsing the web) and not on the other devices that use the same connection (same ISP, Cablecom). So, maybe, somebody wanted to give me a hint...? To continue writing here as quickly as possible? Sorry for my long break of about a week or so... :-( I apologize for this long break. The voices tell me that I shouldn't apologize if I don't mean it like that.

The voices are still here. What shall I say? What do I have to write further? It is horrible what they say and what they announce for my future... They say that I always avoided any difficulties in my life and as a punishment, I will have to face the worst difficulties. And as far as "truly eternal" and "truly infinite" (punishment) is concerned ("they" are threatening it always), it is the "tetration of infinity". Infinite as much as infinite can be. I am not a mathematician and I haven't even fully understood the concept of tetration, but they say that the most infinite infinity is the "tetration of infinity". I am not sure if this makes sense mathematically. This also shows (or might show?) that the voices are just the product of my own thinking. They don't know anything that I couldn't imagine myself. So, being the single worst entity in the whole universe of all universes (as the voices tell me that I am) is probably just my own idea. Probably... I can't be sure. I always "admit" that "if what "they" say essentially is only remotely true, I am (must be) truly in trouble...

I have also tested the voices in order to see if they can predict anything in my life and they are not able to. For example, they told me a couple of minutes ago that the Internet connection will not work again, but it worked... So, what should I truly think of these voices? OK, I might indeed be a bad guy... This might indeed be true... But the single worst entity in the whole universe of all universes? They give as an explanation the fact that in a truly infinite universe, there might be other entities like me who developed such a (horribly wrong?) ideology or at least such an ideology with wrong accompanying intentions. But that I was the only one who received such a gift of God (the gift of feeling God's love immensely) and afterwards (now) trampling on it with his/its (my) feets.

They also very often say "Now, it is over." If you are not able to do that (for example writing the adverb immensely correctly in the first attempt), it will be over. But why should it be "over" (whatever that might mean) simply because I didn't have the knowledge/ability for something? Doesn't make really sense.

What they demand is "true change". That I truly change. That I become a completely different person. That I stop being full of hate, arrogance and egoism... That I not only say or write the right things, but that I do the right things... I must no longer eat meat and waste so many resources... I must learn to work and face my worst fears. Because it is nothing compared to what lies ahead for me in the afterlife if I don't change... :-(

Also an always recurring reproach is that I am too slow because I want to be too slow. That I want to hate. £That I deliberately chose hate as my sole principle of existence. By the way, "they" are also forcing me to write the "I/me/my" words with a dash. Because I am like a dash, nothing. I shouldn't be allowed to write "I" because I am nothing, nobody.

03:19h-03:22h CEST

I also got an e-mail answer from the municipal clerk, I will probably (hopefully this night) give/write him an answer to his answer. I am in delay with everything (I know I should have written about what he wrote me)... I have queue of things that I still have to do, I hope I will be able to get all these things done (for example also paying bills).

03:24h-03:33h CEST

I realized that I probably haven't mentioned how the voices originated yet. They originated out of fears related to the real world (and not the afterlife): That I would be tortured in the most horrible way by a real-world intelligence agency. So, this is the origin of these voices. But they have taken a life of their own (German: "sich verselbständigen") since... "They" are also often telling me that it makes no sense of having been afraid of real-world torture when now, I am hearing what lies truly ahead of me and still not being afraid enough: Truly infinite torture in the afterlife. Because, "they" are telling me, if I believed what they are saying now, I would hurry to change (fundamentally).

"They" also force me to repeat certain words, for example "äs" ("it" in Swiss German) in order to make me realize which what kind of arrogance (and ultimately hate) I am thinking/feeling: "äs", "äs", "äs".

I will stop now because it (here again, the "it") is too stressful to write about what I hear when I am actually hearing it. And then, "they" are saying that this is not even remotely stressful because I will (will with emphasis) see/experience it when I will be in true stress...

Und dänn wirds heissä: "Hetti doch nid!" (And then it will be heard (from me): I shouldn't have done this and that, for example completely refused any profound change.)

03:34h-03:41h CEST

(and 04:33h-04:38h CEST already on Friday, 14th of July 2017)

How will worst possible hell be? Worst possible (infinite) pain, worst possible (infinite) sleep deprivation, worst possible noise, wost possible (infinite) psychosis/fear, worst possible drowning/suffocating/asphyxiating, worst possible smell, worst possible light flashes, victim of the worst possible violence and torture, eternal process of dying (without truly dying because the soul is immortal, they say), everything combined and at the same time and everything without any ability to adapt to it. Isn't that a little bit much? They say I will certainly see it and it won't be funny. And that I will certainly not be the last one who laughs (because in German, there exists the proverb: Who laughs last, laughs best.)

Friday, 14th of July 2017

03:42h-03:51h; 04:47h-04:51h CEST

I will have to abandon my activism for the new municipal constitution of Pfäffikon ZH soon because it leads nowhere (apart from showing how much I am committed to e-democracy). My hometown Pfäffikon ZH is too small and conservative (lying only at the outskirts of the suburb of Zurich) and the population is not ready for e-democracy. I will have to contact Daniel Graf and together we will have to wait until the population in one of the Swiss cantons or in whole Switzerland is ready for an e-democracy to be introduced on the cantonal respectively the federal level with the help of a popular initiative. I assume that such an e-democracy will first be implemented in one of the larger cities of Switzerland or on the cantonal level (in a canton with a large urban and possibly suburban population) and then some time afterwards on the federal level (and hopefully soon thereafter also on the continental (EU) and global level).

03:52h-04:03h; 04:39h-04:45h CEST

By the way, last week, I was also heavily preoccupied with reading the news about the G20 summit in Hamburg (mainly Taz.de, Woz.ch and Tages Anzeiger, but also smaller outlets). I was and I am still shocked by what the police did to peaceful demonstrators. While I understand that the police has to physically "engage" violent demonstrators, people who demonstrate peacefully should not be physically harmed. And also spending the night in makeshift camps should have been allowed and the right to sleep respected. What happened in Hamburg is a disgrace and I am really glad that I didn't go there although I initially felt really unhappy and coward for not traveling there (of course with the special train that started in Basel). It is clear that protests always have to remain strictly peaceful, but as long as this is the case, there should be no physical interference from police / security forces.

04:25h-04:27h; 04:29h-04:32h CEST

Very strange was that there was an Internet interruption beginning at around 04:03h CEST when I tried to upload the two previous sections of this page here. I have become used to these interruptions, they happen almost every night and last around 30-60 minutes. It is probably the 3rd time now that I have (gotten aware of) such an interruption and this time, it was later than in the 2 previous times (between around 04:03h and 04:25h while in the 2 previous instances, it was maybe between 3 and 4 AM if I remember it correctly). And in all 3 occasions, the Internet interruption happened only on this computer here (where I am browsing websites and writing) and not on other computers/tablets/devices.

04:27h-04:29h CEST

By the way, I have listened to again and again to "Freude schöner Götterfunken" of Beethoven's 9th symphony where the chorus sings, it is really beautiful and also a vision for a peacefully united world. (And yesterday, I listened to the "Moonraker" (James Bond series) soundtrack, if I remember it correctly, a soundtrack with which I have decade-old memories.)

Wednesday, 19th of July 2017

02:19h-02:32h; 02:32h-03:34h CEST

Actually, I still wanted to wait one or two days before continuing to write. The problem is that I have been on the computer and the voices came. So, I was forced by "them" to write down what "they" are saying. And "they" wanted also that upload everything, even though it is mainly written in Swiss German (because I hear most of it in Swiss German). So, I upload everything that I have written down, it is nothing really new, there will not being anything fundamentally new because everything has already been said (including TAoE&E).

Here is what the voices have been saying for maybe the last 30-50 minutes (most of it is in Swiss German, I apologize for that):

gsesch äs dänn scho no WIÄ SEHR du hettisch müäsä deeeemuet haa vo -/diinä mitgschöpf. (You will see it TO WHAT EXTENT you should have been more humble towards your fellow beings!)

Gsesch äs dänn scho no! (You will see it!)

...das entscheidäd immer no miär (it is still us who will decide this, not -/you!)

mass haltä isch nid diini schtärchi (being moderate is not one of your strengths!)

hettsch ebä müäsä schnällär sii (welä!) (you should have (wanted to!) be more quick)

you didn’t want to be a good guy, want is the important word in this sentence. (this sentence I heard directly in English)

Ja was ich no alläs hetti machä/lärnä müäsä wänn I d’ziit (und d’unterschtützig vo dä eltärä) ghaa hett... perfekt arabisch chönä usw, sehr vill meh wüssä usw. (Yes, what I should have done/learned if I had had time (and the support from my parents)... knowing Arabic perfectly and so on...; The voices always tell me that I didn't try hard enough, that I was too slow, that I should have learned that and that and this is my sarcastic/frustrated answer to them)

Ich kännä nur di grossä sachä, ich interessiär mich nur dafür (gott, tüüfäl, matti, grossi sprachä und musiginschtrumänt, erfolgriichi Tiärartä). Warum zeigt das WIÄ SEHR ich falsch ligg? (I only know or am interested in the big things (God, the devil, mathematics, most spoken languages and most played musical instruments, succesful animal species). Why does that show HOW MUCH I am wrong?)

Ja warum? Hettisch dich ebä RÄCHTZIITIG drum kümmärä müäsä… (s’wichtigschtä wort isch ebä und müäsä und au rächtziitig isch wichtig, drum gross). (Yes why? You really should have cared about it when it was still time to do it! The most important words in these sentences are "really" and "should" and "in time", because of that "in time" is written with capital letters.)

Gsehsch äs dänn scho no… und dä ganzi Rattäschwanz wo folgä mag/wird… (You will see the whole "rat's tail" (German: "Rattenschwanz") that will follow.)

Gsehsch äs dänn scho no! Du häsch ebä (no) gar nüüt begriffä! (You will see it. You haven't understood anything yet!)

02:32h-03:33h: You don't deserve anything (that is) good.

03:33h-03:34h: Du machsch nur halbi Sachä... Nüüt würkli! Du weigerisch Diich, d'Realität z'akzeptiärä! (You make things only half.)

04:08h-04:19h CEST

I have been eating (and most importantly drinking!) now and returned to the computer. The voices have fortunately subsided now. What do I truly think about them? I think that they don't exist (apart from being electrical discharges in my brain that could be measured with equipment from the future). I am also very skeptical about the existence of hell, especially worst possible and infinite hell. There might be some justice in a possible afterlife, but why should anyone have to endure infinite hell for an infinite amount of time? Even the worst villain on Earth is still too harmless to deserve such a truly horrible fate. But I can't exclude it. Even if these voices don't exist, it could still be the case that at least what (the content of what) they are saying is true, so I can't be completely sure. (But I also realized that they were telling me things about the immediate future and it proved to be wrong. So, they might indeed not know more than I know myself, I was able to disprove them.)

04:32h-04:54h CEST

I am also very sad that Maryam Mirzakhani died last Saturday. :-( :-( This is a particular loss for all humanity! :-(

Thursday, 27th of July 2017

01:18h-01:59h; 02:31h-02:52h; 02:54h-03:03h; 03:04h-03:13h CEST

I am experiencing (this time short) interruptions in my Internet connection so I have the impression that I have to continue here and give an update what I am doing since the last entry is from last week. Maybe I waited too long before continuing to write here and the interruption happened because of that. So what happened in the last days? Most importantly, 2-3 days ago, I read an article in the "Der Landbote" (in German) about the "Artgerecht-Bewegung" ("species-appropriateness movement") which is very promising because it (like me) promotes that infants, babies, toddlers and small children can grow up in a way that makes evolutionarily sense: We humans have innate and evolutionarily very old abilities and needs and they need to be nurtured from birth in order to be allowed to lead a happy life and realize our full emotional, cognitive and spiritual potential. Unfortunately, the species-appropriateness movement is against advanced learning technology (like robots, wearables and VR glasses) from an earliest possible age, even if such technology is employed in an evolutionary sensible/reasonable way, but in all other aspects, I agree with their philosophy: Massively extended time of breastfeeding, allowing the baby to sleep with its parents, carrying the baby around all the time, trying to avoid or shorten the use of diapers, taking things (like learning to walk) slowly, giving time to the child to develop. But this of course doesn't mean that babies shouldn't be exposed to as many languages as possible (including baby sign language) from birth and have the opportunity to try out different types of advanced technology and interact with curious animals from birth. Slowness in some aspects of development is good/beneficial/important/crucial/desirable, but at the same time the baby/child should be provided as many learning opportunities as possible from an earliest age possible, so that the baby/child develops slow in terms of some evolutionary abilities/behavior (weaning; learning to walk; puberty) but fast/early in terms of (earliest possible) onset of learning activities.

By the way, a few weeks ago, I also accidentally (when reading TheGuardian.com) stumbled over a very interesting article about a bush school in New Zealand that unfortunately is also against the employment of modern technology but apart from that, has a very interesting and promising approach (children always learn in natural surroundings and are/become aware of and deeply committed to the need of environmental protection).

Furthermore: 2-4 days ago, I also read (in Tages Anzeiger Online) about this impressive German Muslim female activist that founded a progressive mosque in Berlin. Such initiatives are urgently necessary to bring Islam in line with progressive values and to diminish the influence of the so called "conservatives" (in Islam and in fact in all religions). (Amendment: I looked up her name: Seyran Ateş. And the article in the Tages Anzeiger in which she is very outspoken about the kind of "conservative" Muslims who criticize her can be found here (in German).)

The voices also have improved in the meantime. Although I stopped taking Haldol more than a week ago and only rely on Olanzapin Sandoz since (according to the advice of my psychiatrist), the voices have become more rare and more lenient for the past couple of weeks. I hope that it will stay like that. I really don't believe what these voices are saying. Yes, hell might exist and I might have to endure/suffer there for a couple of time, but (hopefully / certainly?) not for eternity. God is merciful and compassionate and even if the devil exists and is a truly independent (from God) entity, an eternal and infinite punishment makes no sense because no wrong attitude towards life or wrongdoing deserves that. After some time, one must be allowed to exit hell and go into at least into a neutral zone (similar to our life in the real world / this world assuming one has a fairly good life). However, it is still highly advisable to be an as good as possible person because even a limited form of hell might be nasty and very, very difficult to endure.

02:16h-02:29h CEST

I just read that. This is outrageous and almost unbelievable! And it didn't happen in a less developed country, but in the U.S.! :-( What kind of luck that I never had to live in such a situation! I know that the world is not just, but reading such things is always an especially scary reminder of what is possible / can happen... I just hope that God can enforce justice and redeem the suffering/victims in the world at least in a possible afterlife. One has to believe that (and pray for that), otherwise it is too unjust! And I hope (and pray) that a just, peaceful, democratic (and possibly transparent) world will one day also exist in real life.

03:56h-03:58h CEST

Read that, also unbelievable! : http://taz.de/Spanischer-Ministerpraesident-vorgeladen/!5437350/ (in German)

Saturday, 29th of July 2017

04:14h-04:33h; 04:34h-04:38h CEST

I have realized now that besides getting/becoming familiar with the concepts of Islam (and therefore having to learn and practice the Arabic alphabet), I will also have to learn and practice the Devanagari script/alphabet (used for Sanskrit) in order to be able to read the Buddhist expressions/ideas/concepts, because Buddhism is even more important to/for my ideology/religion than Islam because Buddhism lies out of the reach of my ideology/religion (while Islam can easily be integrated into my own religion since it is a monotheistic religion). So, if I really want to become a better person and more universal (and be aware of the shortcomings of my own ideology), I should (also/especially) study Buddhism. (Furthermore, the Devanagari script has the advantage that it was not only used for Sanskrit, but it is also used for a variety of living languages of the Northern part of the Indian subcontinent, especially Hindi and Hindi is one of the languages that I want to include to the list of languages that have to be learned from a very early age also outside of India.)

Friday, 4th of August 2017

02:57h-03:57h CEST

(and a small edit on Wednesday, 9th of August 2017, 01:27h-01:29h CEST)

What happened during the past 6 days that I didn't write? First of all, the voices stayed away mostly, so I didn't have to suffer from them which is very pleasant. :-) :-)

As far as my approach towards Buddhism is concerned, I am a little bit stuck: I still plan to learn the Devanagari script, but I had to stop because I still haven't figured out how to pronounce the letters correctly. But I am perfectly aware that it is possible to learn the various expressions of Buddhism (and Hinduism, Jainism and Taoism which I will have to study too) even without knowing how the expressions were written in their original language (especially Sanskrit).

(Other topic: By the way, tonight, I also m_st_rb_t_d with a very attractive and tall female beach volleyball player (with a beautiful face and abs/sixpack) that I just discovered tonight.)

I also have to state clearly that what the voices say/allege in terms of total destructive nihilism ("total annihilation of everything and everybody") is not true. I don't have the goal to destroy anything on a universal scale and also not on a smaller scale (except things that are also harmful and unnecessary like exhaust fumes, noise, environmental toxins and more generally the unnecessary burning of fossil fuels, these destructive phenomena should indeed by "destroyed"/abolished/phased out as quickly as possible, and this is also the case for issues like censorship, social injustice, authoritarianism and lack of democracy and many issues more). So, should I again mention total destructive nihilism because my voices force me to do, this is not my point of view. Maybe I will have to write that on a separate page and link to this page whenever my voices force me to write about this horrible idea which is probably the most horrible and wrong idea that one could ever imagine/voice/conceive/think up.

By the way, yesterday (last night, the night from 2nd of August to 3rd of August), there was an interruption of my Internet connection, maybe there were people who wanted to indicate to me that I have to distance myself clearly enough from ultimate/universal destructive nihilism because I didn't do that so far. So, I hurried to do that now in this section here.

Tonight, I also read the taz.de and had the idea to (partially) read the party program of the German party "Linkspartei" (since soon, there are elections in Germany). There, I found many of my own demands, but not my most radical demands like a true e-democracy and truly advanced learning environments starting at (and before) birth. Furthermore, my opinion is that schools respectively learning environment providers should be privatized and that parents should be free to chose among them thanks to the provision of vouchers which is in contrast to the "Linkspartei"'s demand that schools should not be privatized (which would suffocate competition between learning environment providers). And there are also other, minor issues where I have a different opinion or a more radical opinion (for example broadband conduit deployment act everywhere instead of just unspecifically demanding "faster broadband service", introduction of a true 24/7 society and a global network of railways instead of airplane travel; the introduction of a belief in mathematics as a new state religion; unconditional radical transparency and universal transparency enforcement everywhere; outlawing eating meat and unnecessary noise like fireworks). So, I hope that at least the German Transhumanist Party will adopt such demands because otherwise, there is no difference among the progressive parties ("Linkspartei", the Greens (which are not really green anymore), the Animal Party (more radical Green party that competes with the established Green party) and the Transhumanist Party) in Germany.

Also very important is to partially rewrite the section about early learning environments on the main page of this website here. Because about 2 days ago, I read a very important article by a Swiss preschool and kindergarten learning specialist about how important "free play" (German: "freies Spiel") is for (young) children and that the opportunities for free play have become more and more rare for kids in the recent decades. So, I will have to make clear that robots should be designed and employed in a way that the promote (and not impede) free play (and the inclusion of animals will certainly help to achieve this goal).

By the way, for the past 2-3 days, it has unfortunately been very hot at my place (also because of this horrible climate change), so I hope that the weather will become colder again. Furthermore, I also had a difficult evening on 1st of August, because it was National Holiday here in Switzerland and many stupid people launched very loud fireworks while I was waiting with earplugs and additionally a hearing protector for them to stop. Despite having all windows of the house closed, wearing earplugs and additionally wearing the strongest hearing protector that exists, the noise was still relatively loud... :-( So, I now just hope that there are no stray/delayed/belated fireworks anymore since I have the windows opened again and only wear earplugs and no hearing protector / acoustic earmuffs.

Last but not least, I will also have to finally give an e-mail answer to the municipal clerk because he wrote me a friendly e-mail and I still haven't given him an answer which is not really polite.

Wednesday, 9th of August 2017

01:21h-02:14h CEST

Yesterday (the night from Monday, 7th of August to Tuesday, 8th of August 2017 to be precise), I was unfortunately too tired to read news on the Internet (or write anything) but instead was in bed (partially) sleeping most of the night. So, only today (tonight, in the night from Tuesday, 8th of August to Wednesday, 9th of August 2017), I am able to read again (politically left) online news on the computer/Internet. And tonight, when I had again returned to reading the news and browsing the web, approximately on 23:30h (or was it already 00:00h?), the Internet connection stopped working for around one and a half (or only one?) hour(s), so I had to do other things than reading news and I also knew/guessed that I had to write again on my blog page here because already 5 days have past by now since I last wrote on my blog page here. It is always good to write on my blog page here even if I don't have anything fundamentally new to say/write. Because like that, trust can be established between my readers and me and writing is also some kind of (sometimes strenuous (German: "mühsam")) work that I simply have to do for my readers so that they don't get anxious what happened with me (since I unfortunately have these relatively nasty voices from time to time). By the way, in the last 5 days that I didn't write, I didn't have the voices, at least not in a very nasty way. If I remember it correctly, in the past 5 days, I had them once in a relatively strong way but only for quite a short time (one or two hour(s) or so), so no problem at all. The situation with my voices has actually massively improved in the last 2-3 weeks (I don't remember for how long exactly), which is astonishing because I completely stopped taking Haldol (Haloperidol) and relied only on Olanzapin Sandoz (Olanzapine) which is in line with what my psychiatrist (and my mother) told me. So, at the moment, I am taking my regular 10 milligrams of Cipralex (Excitalopram) in the late afternoon (when I have gotten up) and 10 milligrams of Olanzapin Sandoz (Olanzapine) in the early morning before going to sleep, thereby following the medication advice of my psychiatrist. Next week, I will have again an appointment at my psychiatrist (if it is not too hot), so maybe she will give me new advice.

Another good thing of the past 5 days is that there were no major unexpected or very loud fireworks anymore that could have caught/surprised me when I was outside or near an open window (like always, I am wearing earplugs all the time), so my hearing is in good state. And since the National Holiday of 1st of August is now already one week past, there will probably no major fireworks anymore, at least not on a working day (during the week), but in the evenings of the weekends I still have to expect occasional firework noise.

By the way, tomorrow Thursday morning will be a planned (by the municipal electricity service/utility) power outage of 4 hours between 08:00h and 12:00h, so our 2 desktop computers (the one of my mother and mine) will not be running then and some time afterwards.

I am also still committed to reading Wikipedia articles about the very important religions that originated in India (mainly Buddhism, Jainism and Hinduism and maybe Sikhism) since I still have a knowledge gap / lack of knowledge as far as these religions are concerned. And I will also have to look more closely to the traditional religions of China.

On next weekend (from Friday noon/midday until Sunday), my (biological) father will visit us (my mother and me), I hope that this will not mean a lot of stress for me since my biological has his strong beliefs and habits and wants to impose them on other people. Anyway, I will sleep most of the time/day since I only get up in the middle or late afternoon.

Sorry for the relatively boring text that I wrote here, but I felt compelled to write something because I had this very strange interruption of my Internet connection around 2 hours ago.

Monday, 21st of August 2017

04:05h-05:14h and 05:36h CEST

It has been quite a long time since I wrote the last time, I didn't realize it so far.

Tonight, I had 2 Internet interruptions, maybe because it is time to write again on this blog page here, so I decided to finally write here again.

So what happened in the meantime (since I last wrote)? The terrorist attacks in Barcelona (Islamist) and Charlottesville (right wing), among others. So, I want to condemn such attacks in the strongest possible way! The attackers in Barcelona and surroundings were born in the West, so why are they so reprehensible to launch a terror attack instead of trying to be involved in politics in a peaceful way? :-( In the age of the Internet, nobody needs to commit terrorist attacks, especially not in the West where people are free to express their views (and thanks to the Internet also in a very efficient and inexpensive way) and assemble and demonstrate peacefully!

Measures to struggle against terrorism (just my proposals, maybe I have forgotten something):

  • More democracy, preferably e-democracy: locally, regionally, nationally, continentally and globally! Every person should struggle for more democracy, not only at home, but also elsewhere/globally!
  • Replace parliaments, governments and courts with Internet-based bodies composed/consisting of citizens (e-democracy everywhere).
  • Intelligent cars/vehicles with mechanisms (that cannot be tampered) to stop any vehicle nearby immediately! There should be the possibility that the stopping mechanism can be operated/triggered from any smartphone/smartwatch within a second.
  • Outlaw all gun/weapons possession and sale/purchase with sufficiently high and deterring penalties for noncompliance. Especially heavily monitor all substances and equipment required for making explosives.
  • Restrict playing time of violent computer games and interview such players on a regular base (and promote computer game development instead as a creative activity instead of excessive playing)
  • Automatic/radical/unconditional and Internet-based transparency and ubiquitous transparency enforcement (by every citizen instead of the much more ineffective government) in order to maximize the chance that hidden activities are detected quickly/early enough.
  • Ethics tuition/class/instruction were young people are taught how important and crucial altruism, empathy, charity and compassion are and that one should always put oneself in the shoes (see it from the perspective) of another person.
  • Introduction of advanced learning environments from birth for every child (with the inclusion of curious animals) instead of the totally outdated school system/paradigm that we unfortunately still have in place. :-(
  • Sexual socialism and sexual/dating transparency or at least the demand for it and/or the discussion about unequal chances on the dating market (when trying to date someone), because unattractive (young) people need to have a platform where they can discuss their lack of attractiveness and what it means for (how it negatively affects) their dating prospects.
  • Introduction of genetic engineering (eugenics) of humans as soon as possible for all people/parents who want it.
  • Unconditional basic income for everybody so that nobody has to worry anymore about poverty or being forced to work in an unpleasant job.
  • And last but not least: Belief in mathematics and mathematical abilities of humans/animals in order to give our society/civilization a common (sensible) goal and increase the chance that the transhumanist revolution will succeed and humanity will survive also in the longer term (and as peacefully as possible).

Today, I saw a several very impressive underwater videos of several Octopuses playing with humans. This is a huge potential for learning and developing interaction robots that has to be harnessed by education as soon as possible!

And around 2 days ago, I also read in the Tages Anzeiger (newspaper for the greater Zurich area) that coding / computer programming will be introduced in the 5th class of primary school (the pupils are then around 11 years old) in the Canton of Zurich. This is definitely good news! :-) But it is not enough, information technology learning (software development and precursor activities) should begin already at birth!

I should also not forget to mention that I have one pupil now who comes once a week for a lesson of one hour (except for the holidays) and that earn 30 Swiss francs for each lesson. I also have two other pupils, I hope that I will be able to teach them concepts of coding with Scratch in the future again (in case of them, I do it free of charge, because I have known them from many years).

Furthermore, as far as I am concerned, nothing much happened at my place, my situation is still the same as it was the last time I wrote here. Tonight, I am hearing the voices again, but it is not to bad and they are basically always telling the same, so no big deal. And I am, as always, taking my medication (10 milligrams of Cipralex in the late afternoon, after having gotten up, and 10 milligrams of Olanzpin Sandoz before going to bed in the early morning). And I am, as always, following the news in German and English.

And I still have to answer this friendly e-mail from the municipal clerk in order to be polite, I apologize for my massively delayed answer, I know I am by far too slow! :-(

And I have to thank Anonymous for all the help and support that I received for so many years, I am increasingly aware how much I owe these people (actually, I should say "you", because you are probably constantly at my side, thank you guys...!). :-)

05:23h-05:32h CEST

I forgot to mention that I am also continuing to read about Buddhism (and hopefully also other ancient religions of South, Southeast and East Asia) in Wikipedia. It is very important for me to see that a very different religious mindset (from mine) like Buddhism also makes perfectly sense and might even be superior (or at least an important complement/addition) to my own religious belief in (God and) mathematics. Especially the fact that one should always be moderate and struggle for the middle is plausible. And that (wrong) desire is the cause of suffering and injustice. Two very important points/issues that I have to keep in mind.

Tuesday, 22th of August 2017

06:13h-06:43h; 06:52h-06:59h CEST

I had 2 Internet connection interruptions today again, maybe it was because my computer had gotten so slow and I was given a hint to restart it in order to not having to wait too long when using the computer. Or it was simply because I need to write again or clarify what I wrote yesterday. Or because I should finally write the e-mail to the municipal clerk? I don't know what was the reason for the 1-2 interruption(s) of the Internet connection. Anyway, I will extend the list above (proposals to end terrorism) as soon as possible because I have still other ideas that could be included in the list too. Very important is for example also that people still have the right to immigrate everywhere they wish because I think global freedom of movement, living and job opportunities is a basic human right. But I have also other ideas, for example that the unconditional right for peaceful speech and the possibility of counterspeech (German: "Gegenrede") at the same place is granted everywhere and especially in our Western democracies so that one can vent one's anger about anything (as long as the speech is peaceful). And of course wars/hostilities should end globally and the environment should be protected, but this is actually part of the struggle for e-democracy because true democracy will (hopefully) mean the end of wars/violence, social injustices and environmental destruction.

I have several very old and outdated smartphones and also a tablet with a very outdated operating system. So, although I don't like to spend money and contribute to the consumption of more natural resources, I will have to buy a new mobile phone or tablet. I am at the moment looking for it.

And I know that I really really have to write this thank-you e-mail to the municipal clerk, I am postponing and still postponing it... And on next Saturday, there is already the next meeting which interested citizens of the municipality are invited to attend, so I should thank him before this meeting takes place and not just one day before, but earlier. Today, I will also have to go to a regular meeting/appointment with my psychiatrist, I hope I will manage to go there because it is very difficult for me to leave my house. And my girlfriend Christine is also not well, she feels more and more sick, with every month, I will have to visit her as soon as possible. She lives in Uetikon am See in a residential home for people with a chronic illness and I haven't been able to meet her for one and a half years. :-(

I also read this very good article by Jeremy Scahill on the TheIntercept.com that summarizes everything that is wrong with the Trump administration and the focus of most media on Trump's erratic and destructive behavior instead of what this administration is really doing secretly, namely killing people without trial. It's not possible to achieve peace with violence. :-( The media should stop to focus only on Trump's stupid and irrelevant statements (which are distractions) and instead report about the real (and often hidden) issues and injustices! :-(

Thursday, 24th of August 2017

07:31h-07:38h CEST

A couple of minutes ago, I finally sent my newest e-mail to the municipal clerk of Pfäffikon ZH and I also added the text of the e-mail to the page Totalrevision der Gemeindeordnung von Pfäffikon ZH. I am glad that I finally did the effort to write this quite long e-mail that I had to edit and check very thoroughly in order to improve its clarity and avoid grammar or typing mistakes. What I will still have to do is adding the e-mail's text to the corresponding Facebook page. But I am tired now and need to go to bed, I will do it later.

All in all, everything is OK with me at the moment. I didn't even have the voices tonight. :-)

Friday, 25th of August 2017

06:28h-06:32h; 06:41h-06:54h; 06:56h CEST

By the way, I have been writing messages forth and back for the past days with a complete stranger who wrote on my Facebook wall, her name is Karin Moeckli and our conversation can be found here or simply on my Facebook wall beginning on the date of 21st of November 2015. The conversation is a little bit hidden after my third message, so you have to open the answers to my third message (the third message is the one from 21st of November 2015 at 19:03h CEST). It is the first time that I had a longer public conversation on Facebook and I am very glad and grateful for it because I finally got a reaction that I longed for / expected for so long! :-) :-) :-) My initial text entries on the 21st of November 2015 are in English, but/and the subsequent conversation with Karin Moeckli is in Standard German.

Saturday, 2nd of September 2017

03:19h-03:43h CEST

Tonight, I had 2 interruptions (with a duration of around 1 hour each) of my Internet connection again, so I thought it would be good to write something here in my blog. My situation has slightly improved. :-) I have now a second pupil who is willing to pay me (30 Swiss francs) for the lessons I give. :-) So, I am motivated to work more and more and in a way that my pupils can benefit from my tuition as much as possible. :-) What I am also contemplating is opening a computer and smartphone consultancy company, so I would have two jobs: Giving lessons / private tutoring and computer/smartphone consultancy. I hope I will be able to work 20-30 percent in these two occupations which would be a massive improvement to today's situation. Like that, the supplementary allowances of my disability benefits would also be reduced because I earn my own money.

As always, I am reading (mostly moderate left and strictly left) news: The Tages Anzeiger (in German), TheIntercept.com (in English), the Taz.de (in German), the Woz.ch (in German), the 12App (in German) and occasionally TheGuardian (in English). I hope that I will still have enough time to read online news (and write on this page here, although it is not really a lot, it could and probably should be more) once I work more.

The information about the meeting/workshop of the municipality (that I was unfortunately not able to attend, see my entry on the page Totalrevision der Gemeindeordnung von Pfäffikon ZH) have been uploaded, the can be found here. I have only briefly looked at the document and was not able to see anything about e-democracy, maybe it wasn't discussed at all, I will have to have a closer look as soon as I find time. But for me, the issue in the context of the total revision of the Municipal Code is not longer pressing, I will have to find other ways to advocate for the introduction of e-democracy: Founding my own Transhumanist Party of Switzerland; trying to discuss and bring forward the issue in the Pirate Party of the Canton of Zurich and Switzerland (where I am a passive member); trying to find like-minded people via the Internet; and last but not least asking Daniel Graf from WeCollect.ch one day if he can start a popular initiative on the cantonal or federal level for the introduction of an e-democracy.

03:48h-03:56h CEST

By the way, I have the voices tonight but tonight (as it has been the case also in earlier nights) they fortunately don't seem too "loud"/strong/haunting (German: "eindringlich"). I think that the problem with the voices will stay for a long time to come, but it will stay the same and not deteriorate, at least I hope that. Until now, the problem has not become worse.

Saturday, 16th of September 2017

04:26h-04:39h CEST

It has been two weeks since I last wrote on this blog page here (and there was an interruption of the Internet connection tonight), so I probably need to give a new sign of life (German: "Lebenszeichen"). My situation has slightly improved: I have now a second student and he is coming every week so that I can earn 30 Swiss francs additionally every week. Like always, I am taking my regular medication: 10 milligrams of Olanzapin Sandoz and 10 milligrams of Cipralex. Furthermore, I have begun taking additionally 2.5 milligrams of Haldol (Haloperidol) in the hope that the voices (which I unfortunately still have) will be reduced by the Haldol.

I have also realized that suddenly, more and more politicians are demanding that programming/coding is introduced into the school curriculum (of primary school if I have understood it correctly). So, established politicians are finally realizing how crucial real computer science education is which is very good, but by far too late. Too much time has been lost and most young people (aged 15-30) of today had to grow up without having had the opportunity to explore computer and smartphone programming/coding at a sufficiently early age. Furthermore and nevertheless, as far as the established politicians and their ideas/demands are concerned, it would be vital to begin with computer science and robotics education already immediately after birth, introducing it in primary school is too late, but the established politicians haven't realized this so far, they are always lagging one or several steps behind. :-(

05:00h-05:08h CEST

What I forgot to mention in the preceding (sub)section: I not only have 2 (paying) students now, but I am also planning to begin ICT (computer and smartphone, etc.) consulting services in a few weeks or even days. I hope I will be able to give advice to ICT users by phone and by e-mail and earn a little bit of additional money with it by receiving voluntary donations/remunerations in case I have been able to help/assist the inquirers with my advice.

October, November and December 2017

In these 3 months, I didn't write any blog entries, neither here nor elsewhere. Only on Tuesday, 9th of January 2018, I wrote my next blog entry (see My blog of 2018).

Year 2018

See My blog of 2018.

See also